So BM drops off of the SS4 & SS5, every weekend at approximately 5pm because when it's the school year, it's really difficult on SS5 who started school this past year. So the boys are not home yet. I send her a text message asking when the boys will be home as it is now past 5pm. She messages me back to tell me that the court order (I'm Canadian) states that she doesn't have to bring the boys back until 6pm on Sunday. This is the first only time she wants to adhere to the court order in the 3.5 years that it's been in place. So I say fine, to message me when she is about to bring the boys home as I am going to go out and get a few things. She tells me that she is coming in 10 minutes. So she brings them home.

When she pulls up, I hurry out there as so she can't maul the boys and make them cry... that's her trick. Makes them cry because they wanna stay with Mommy!!! So I hurry out there, I need to get back in the house since I have dinner on the stove and I have a 9month daughter in a high chair. So I collect the boys, ask her if she is taking the boys the following weekend since she told us two weeks ago that she may not pick them up, she has plans to go out of town. So she confirmed she is going out of town, and that she won't be getting the boys. Then she asks me to pick them up for dinner on Wednesday night as soon as she is done work and then she will bring them home at 7pm, to make up of the fact that she won't pick them up on the weekend.

I advise my DH about this and tell him, that if it were me, that no she shouldn't be able to take them for dinner as it's a couple of hours of torture for them. Being told that yet again she isn't coming for them and it's going to make them cry. It's just going to be more upsetting for them then anything. Since he was at work, he said we would discuss this when he was home. Well he comes home, I tell him I am frustrated because I'm the fall back net. I am the one that is constantly collecting the boys during drop offs as well as doing the hand offs. So it's constantly me. And she f*cks us over all them time, telling us that she is sick and needs to bring the boys home immediately, so I have to drop what I am doing and hurry home to meet them, only to have to wait 3 hours to figure out that they won't be coming home for another hour. Meanwhile, I've ditched my weekly grocery cart in the store to be there for them. So I'm tire of it. I tell him he keeps telling me that he is going to stand up to her and tell her no or put his foot down, and never does. NEVER DOES. So he anwers that he doesn't want to tell her no for dinner because then she could say no for keeping the boys for a small mini vacation weekend we have planned and upcoming.

But there is always an excuse. It's always someething. She picks up the boys when she wants, she comes early and drops off early. She is terrible. She only gets them on weekends and she can't follow a schedule or routine to save her life. She screws up the boys schedule all the time. And she makes it sound like the boys are scared so she let's them sleep in her bed at night. What grown up sleeps with a 4 & 5 yr old in bed. It's not right. And when she does get a boyfriend, the the boys are kicked back to their beds. It's happened in the past already.

I'm just frustrated. I feel bad because I feel like I'm treating less like my sons and more like kid I babysit. I hate feeling like this but I can feel like I am detaching from them. It's sad.

And please keep in mind, the BM - she has done soooooo many other things then just this.