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Not sure if I did the right thing…

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SD10’s mom facetimed her yesterday about her drama situation with her friends and her previous boyfriend she had (my opinion, a 10 year old shouldn’t have a boyfriend.). She was asking her what happened and giving her advice. DH (SD’s dad) gave her some advice too while she was on the phone with her mom. She was already throwing a fit with them about it. Her attitude is horrible. DH had to do something so they both got off the phone and SD went to her room. DH motioned me to go in her room and talk to her about the situation, but I froze.

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Is this my insecurity?

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So we all get along with BM and her husband. We met with them and the kids to go eat and then us and the kids go home. We were all eating and my husband got a steak. As he was eating, BM said she remembered one time (when they were together) when he and her were eating and he got a steak that was dark red and looked bloody. My husband said “yeah and you were gagging the whole time.” Then I said something about how I had one similar to that one time. It was when me and my husband (her ex husband) were eating. He didn’t say anything about it when I brought it up.

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Should I tell BM?

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I work in retail where I do the grocery pickup. I get along with BM (husband's ex wife), and she had placed an order. She asked me if it was ready and I said I would check for her. When I pulled up her name, it had her previous last name which is my husband's last name. Now, I have placed an order before where I forgot to change my last name because it still showed my maiden name. She (BM) is remarried and has had her name changed on everything (except that, apparently). Should I tell her about it or should I just let it be?

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I don’t know what to do…

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I don’t really know how to put this. SD9 lives with her mom during the week because they go to school there and me and DH work. For a few weekends, SD9 absolutely does not want to see her dad on the weekends. It’s the only time he gets to see her. She always throws a fit and wants to stay with her grandmother (who literally lives beside her moms and who she sees every day). It breaks my heart for DH because she does this every weekend and somehow BM overrides DH on how she needs to come on the weekends meaning she will let SD have her way 90% of the time.

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SD9 doesn’t want me and her dad to go on vacation with her…

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So all of us (BM, her husband, & my step kid’s little sister, my husband, me, step kid’s grandparents and aunt and uncle) are all going on vacation. It was decided last minute that me and my husband are going because we found out we can take off work then. BM told SD9 that we were going and she said “i thought it was just us” with a pouty face which basically implies she doesn’t want us to go. How would you feel? I would like a family picture but since she doesn’t want us to go I feel sad. She honestly wants to do stuff with me so I don’t understand why she’s acting this way.

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Green eyed monster coming out…

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My situation is different from most. My husband is disabled and cannot drive (legally blind). BM helps out and drives him places he needs to go whenever I have to work. Sunday they went to church (I didn’t go because I was sick) and later ate lunch at a place the kids wanted to eat (my stepkids). BM's husband knew about it and was fine with it. She texts him random things about the kids which I guess is reasonable because it’s his kids. She texted him saying she brought SD9 to the nail salon to have her nails taken off (acrylics). I mean he has every right to know about his kids, I know.

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SD9 likes to do her own hair now…

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My step daughter is 9 and likes to fix her own hair, especially for church. Her mom usually fixes her hair for other events and if she has her on the weekend, she fixes it for church. Should I let my SD continue to fix her own hair or should I do it for her? Sometimes it looks a little messy, but not bad. I fix it if she asks me but I don’t ask. I have braided her hair before but tried to fix it for church one day and I am no good at it. I get nervous and lumps are always in her hair. Do y’all do your SD’s hair or let them?

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Breaking my OCD habit...

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So this is tied in with my OCD and I want to break this habit. My stepdaughter (9) does beauty pageants and has been for a few years now. She got a new dress at almost every pageant and I have felt the need to take a picture with her. She has a pageant this weekend, but is wearing the same dress she wore a couple of months ago. I feel like every time she has a pageant, that I have to take a picture with her. We all go to her pageant (her mom, step dad, my husband (her dad) and me). Her mom takes pictures of her as well, but not with her and only posts pictures of her.

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Should I let this bother me?

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So my husband and I coparent and get along with BM and her husband. We have each other on our social media for tagging each other in posts of the kids. There have been times where BM will post and tag us in pics of the kids and my husband will “love” it. I get it, that’s his kids and that’s their mother. Sometimes when I post of us and the kids and tag him, he doesn’t “love” react to it or says he saw it, but didn’t hit the “love” button. I mean should I let this bother me? Sometimes I feel like he needs or has to “love” it because it’s his kids and that’s their mother.

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