I received a phone call from SD18 last week. First time in...4.5 years? We last saw her on Fathers Day. She was looking for her dad. He was ill and in bed (man cold, nothing serious) and she was trying to get me to wake him up. She wouldn't tell me what she wanted. So I told her if it wasn't an emergency that I would have him call her when he woke up.

A few days later, DH comes to me and says that SD wants him to cosign on a car. I abruptly stopped laughing my head off when I noticed his kicked puppy dog face. I said you're not seriously considering this are you? "Well ya!! That's my kid! I want to help her!"

Ok Mr. Helpful: What car? A $12K Volskwagon.

She's had a job for how long? 3 weeks.

Did she graduate high school? No. She failed out her last semester and started "online" before virtual learning was a thing for everybody. She failed the same two classes THREE TIMES so far and apparently they are going to keep letting her retake them forever.

So first of all, there would be no cosigning. Dh would be the primary borrower. My vehicle is on its last leg and we will need a new one any day now. We are still paying on our main vehicle. Having 3 car payments would be insane. 

He sadly nods his head, realizing all of these concerns are valid.

Then his genius idea is to sell her MY FUCKING CAR. My old ass car with 200,000+ miles on it, that's been paid off for almost 10 years and still gets me from A to B. I'm proud of that car. It's MINE. The only thing in this goddamn world that is mine all mine. His name isn't on it. He never paid a dime for it. I bought the thing before we got married.  Aside from that, the car isn't worth anything and I'm not going to sell it to someone so it can blow a head gasket three days later.

Working from home allows us to get by with one vehicle for the most part, but he still goes in to the office once a week. Baby face has school. We need two vehicles for that one day. His solution? "SD can come Monday mornings and bring DS to school." Are you screaming daft? She couldn't get her ass out of bed and to school for HERSELF. What makes you think she'll be at our house at 7:30 a.m. for ANYONE ELSE? No, DH. Fuck no. I'm not relying on her to get my kid to school. 

We had both skids over for dinner last night. Dh laid it all out to SD as to why none of it was happening. He used the exact same reasoning and even some of the same language I used with SD. She was understanding and accepted the valid concerns. She "decided" that a $4K to $5K vehicle was more realistic. Yep. And we're still not cosigning on that!!! Pass your fucking classes!!