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FSD catered to constantly

Lioness77's picture

Submitted by Lioness77 on Thu, 01/19/2012 - 9:18pm

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Teenage Stepchildren

Cooked dinner tonight, went to the store to get some treats.
Despite FSD13 waking again at 4pm, he says " if you do the dishes I will get you a treat and a Pepsi. He reiterates this includes the WHOLE KITCHEN.

So. We get back, walk in, and the kitchen is half done.
He goes to hand her the treat and Pepsi.
I say in front of her, NOT UNTIL.SHE'S FINISHED.
He follows me back to the room, asks what my problem is.
I tell him loudly that I'm sick of her getting rewarded before she's done the task because she doesn't follow thru.

So. He says, " she DID IT! She's done"

Hmmmmmm.
We go outside and he goes back in to get the snow shovel, says to FSD " you need to go finish okay honey " turns around to make sure I heard him....
Umm... backup. I thought she was done?? You lied to get me off your back? < I'm thinking this >

So. I am watching tv, FDH goes into the kitchen when he comes in from shoveling.
He starts PUTTING AWAY DINNER and WASHES ALLLLLLL the pots, pans and cleans the counters??

FSD is sitting right there on the couch not even a care, drinking her soda and eating her undeserved treat and playing on her Ipod.

What the HELL is wrong with forcing a teenager to be honest, follow through and listen to instructions??

Please don't ever let her get pregnant I don't want him feeling bad and RAISING her baby!!!

emotionaly beat up's picture

Submitted by emotionaly beat up on Fri, 01/20/2012 - 2:09am

Dad's like this would carry and deliver the baby for them if they could. If this keeps up trouble will follow. He is her dad, not her best friend and as a parent he needs to teach her how to live in the real world, how to be responsible, follow instructions, complete a task, and be trustworthy. One day she may get a job and if she does her employer is going to expect her to be able to follow simple instructions and complete her allocated tasks before he pays her, if she hasn't learnt these skills, she will get fired, well done dad, you are raising another little daddy's princess who will grow up to be manipulative, cunning, and a liar. She will be a bully and have an overinflated sense of entitlement and the only person on the planet who will like her is you. I know how frustrating this must be for you, but the problem is completely of your DH's making and I think you know that. Try not to take it out on the kid Smile

momagainfor4's picture

Submitted by momagainfor4 on Fri, 01/20/2012 - 9:39am

True that it's not the kid's fault. The DH needs to stop trying to make you be the bad guy.
I think that he needs to understand that there are boundaries and rules that you set for teens to make them learn how to handle responsibilities.
I'm sad bc I just really don't know of anything that I can say to help you. Except don't waste your whole life on this.
This is a huge character flaw. The way he treats you is just wrong.

Lioness77's picture

Submitted by Lioness77 on Fri, 01/20/2012 - 1:22pm

We've been together 4 1/2 years.
I know its him not his kids. And I know we teach people how to treat us.

I'm putting up with it.

Strange because I put up with it while complaining on the side and seeing no change.

He does the same with his kids. Complains they don't follow thru, then doesn't apply behavior changing tactics.

Weird to think its like a cycle.

His son came home last night at 130am. He also didn't report this to the court . He's suppose to report violations of probation. Never has, feels bad...

I know I'm allowing it and staying. I know. I'm just trying to find a way to impart some change....maybe?