Finally Starting To Show True Colors Around DH
I think DH is finally getting a dose of who his dear precious princess really is! Here the last couple of weeks, she had hardly spoken to anyone in the house...SD has been hiding out in her room constantly (when she is not at her cousin's asking if she can stay yet another night), and he basically has to beg her to come out to simply give him a hug. Even then, she acts like she is so disgusted that he wants to show her any kind of affection.
She is still being lazy as heck! He has been on her for a week now to pick up her room, and basically just gets a "whatever" attitude as she SAYS she'll do it...then she just closes the door and sits around on her tablet...surfing the web and chatting with friends (since she can't do it on her phone).
Don't get me wrong, she does have her moments of buttering up...like when the weekend is coming around and there is a chance for a shopping trip. Right now, she is trying to convince DH that she needs more clothes...saying that the clothes she got just a few weeks ago are starting to feel too big as she claims she has lost weight the last few weeks! Really? How is that possible when you have slept until noon to 1:00 p.m. EVERY DAY, and when you are awake, you are stuffing your face with any junk food you can find (no, she doesn't ever want to eat real food...cereal, cheese sandwiches, snack crackers, ice cream...that is all she wants unless we are going out to eat...there are plenty of other healthy options in the house, but she just "isn't feelin' it"). Of course, we are talking about the girl who does not like her clothes unless they are super tight on her...that is her definition of "fit"...who cares if she totally has a muffin top going on! Anyway, she has already been told she needs to do with what she has (there really is not a ton of difference between the 6 I know she is based on how I've seen that size fit on her, and the 4 she is trying to claim to be). She can wear a belt on the 6's and deal with it if she thinks they are too loose! When I was losing real weight for real health reasons (used to be over 200 lbs and a size 18), I wouldn't get new clothes until I went down "two" women's sizes (meaning 10 to 6, because really, 8 is just the next size down). Not to mention, we got the 6's because she said her 4's were too small, so what happened to the 4's? She hasn't given me anything to go to Goodwill, so did she just throw them in the trash? Oh wait, knowing her, she probably did...why give perfectly good clothes to a charity when you can just throw them in the trash can, right? It's ONLY money!
So yeah, DH is finally starting to get on to the same page with me, as he is seeing how selfish she is being. I am finding him saying no more often, and sticking to it, the last couple of weeks...especially after he realized how ticked off I was about him going behind my back and getting her hair dye after we discussed it (oh, and the wonderful purple she had to have, yeah, because she went swimming...rule # 1, do not go swimming with color-treated hair without a cap on...it now looks like some total crap bleached out pink).
Oh, did I mention she didn't even try to get DH jack for Father's Day? She could of asked me to help her find something, I had a couple of ideas of things DH has said he wanted, and some of those things weren't even very expensive. Shoot, she didn't even ask if I could help her get a card! My son, on the other hand, used his hard earned money from work to buy DH a gift without me even having to ask him "What are you getting dad for Father's Day!" Pretty sad! In the past, SD would draw DH pictures and stuff, no, not even that this year! It is sad when a child that doesn't even share the same DNA cares more about DH than his own flesh and blood! I don't know, maybe it is the difference between my son understanding that DH CHOSE to be his dad by adopting him, and SD just takes for granted, "Oh, you HAVE TO love me because I'm your blood!" Or, maybe it is because I was actually allowed parent my kids, so they treat DH with much more respect.
Now, if only I can get DH to make SD do chores...and seriously, I'm praying that he doesn't make her get up earlier, I'm kinda enjoying the peace of the first half of the day with her asleep, gives her less time in front of the TV, or trying to blare her music through the house while I'm trying to work, etc. A few hours of peace is better than none! They really are darlings when they are asleep. 
So, how are your summers going?
I keep hoping I hear the
I keep hoping I hear the strange noise of the vacuum or something, but I'm not holding my breath!
Oh, and get this...some may remember my post about the hair, that DH and I agreed that SD would not dye the tips of her hair, but then he went behind my back while I was at a college visit and allowed SD to do it anyway. The AGREEMENT between SD and DH was that at the end of the summer, SD would get the colored part cut off. NOW, she is already trying to go back on that deal and is asking if she can dye her hair all one color again, instead! PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE don't let DH give in! Please let him stick to the original deal! I KNEW SD would try to back out of it, and push for the dye job...I just new it! She thinks that because I get my hair colored and maintained, it isn't a big deal. I had to explain to her that me and my hairdresser are on a barter system...I maintain her computers, she maintains my hair, and that does not extend to the rest of the family! I am paying for my hair visits with work...may not be money, but it might as well be (especially if any of you know what an hour of computer service...getting rid of viruses and stuff...is worth if you hire a professional, which is my day job). She won't even do chores to earn money for things that aren't NEEDS! She wants hair dye, makeup, new clothes all the time (when the clothes she has are perfectly fine)...girlfriend needs to learn the value of hard work! The deal was she would get the ends cut off if she dyed them, and that is the deal I'm going to push my husband to stick to, because I'm NOT spending $100 for my stylist to dye her hair! Not to mention, she doesn't even want it her natural color! She wants it black, and her hair is a very light brown, so yeah, then there is the maintenance involved on the roots. I don't think so! And considering how she keeps her bathroom already, I am NOT buying her a $10 box of hair dye every month to let her do it herself...that whole bathroom would be black!
I even mentioned after the whole discussion about the hair that the trash can needed to be brought in from the curb and the trash taken out. All I got was an, "Eh" as she went to sit her lazy butt on the couch! It's too hot for her to take 2 minutes to go get the can from the curb and wheel it back to the house...yeah, but she wants us to just buy her whatever?
Oh, believe me, her laundry
Oh, believe me, her laundry is piled up. She has been wearing the same pair of jeans for over a week now, because she is too lazy to wash, and "can't find any other pants"! Just this past weekend, DH asked her what she has been doing all week, because her room STILL isn't clean. She claimed she has been working all week on cleaning it. Really? That is why no laundry or trash has come out of that room! She doesn't get up until 1 p.m., then sits in front of the TV for about 2 hours (because that is all that she is allowed). Then, she heads back to her room, and any time I need to find her for something (like to tell her I'm leaving for the gym, and DH will be home shortly), she is lying on her bed texting and messing with her tablet, or she is in the bathroom putting on makeup and messing with her hair because she is bored and didn't have anything else to do. She hasn't even started on her room! I'm just leaving it alone, and DH can deal with it!
As for the dishes, unfortunately, DH and SD aren't the only ones in the house. My son will rinse his dishes and put them in the dishwasher...with his work schedule, he usually scarfs up the left overs from whatever we have for dinner when he gets home...if there is anything left, or he grabs something he can cook in the microwave. I can't punish him because of SD, because the boy does work hard...school, football practice, theater, his job...he's doing what he should be doing.
Here is how I approached the hair situation...with SD sitting right there, I brought up to DH that SD was trying to change the deal on her hair, and that she now wanted to dye it all black. DH flat out told my SD no, without even a prompt from me!! I was surprised! She sat there and pouted about it (it was in the car, where she couldn't just run off to her room and not deal with it). Plan on holding DH to it!
@MamaC...I figured it was the
@MamaC...I figured it was the best way to let her know I'm done with her little manipulation games, and I will not hesitate to put BOTH of them on the spot if I have to.
When we were in the car, it hit me that it would be the best time to bring it up, BECAUSE she couldn't run away from it. She makes it a habit to suddenly have to go to the bathroom when a conversation isn't going her way, and then from there, she sneaks back into her room rather than returning.