Possible Case of Munchausen in Bio Mom
I've been struggling with the BM of my step son. She is pushing this identity of being a single mother of a special needs child, but he has no diagnosis and no real challenges. He goes to PT once a week by doctor reccomendation and has ankle orthodics because he has bendy joints, but he can run and play and function like any other kid. She tried to fight us in court to not send him to after school for an hour every day on our weeks with him due to fatigue, but has just signed him up for weekly swim team twice a week on top of his weekly PT and also martial arts classes every saturday. She has also developed an identity around his "disability" using it to write articles for money and even to get a new job (requirement for the posting was to be a parent of a special needs child). We have spoken with multiple people involved in his care (PT therapists, behavioral therapist, doctors and specialists). Many of these professionals have shown concern for her behavior, but since he isn't being harmed we can't do anything about it. I'm not sure how to get her to relax and stop trying to enforce a special needs identity on him that will eventually harm him either physically or psychologically.
Has your husband had any
Has your husband had any opportunity to speak with the DR who is in charge of his son's care? How often does he have custody? Is it possible for him to take him to a 2nd Dr for another opinion?
There certainly ARE cases on here where BM's have made their kids helpless dependents in order to feed their own needs. I can see how being treated differently could cause the child some issue.
Yes he's talked to all of the
Yes he's talked to all of the specialists and doctor's. The only one that openly sided with her only said they would support the diagnosis. She then submitted that write up as proof to his school and the court as evidence for his disorder. Physical custody is 50/50 but she has full legal so we can't stop her. We've tried taking her to court to change the order but with no success because there is no evidence of physically harmful behavior.
Highest importance for your
Highest importance for your dh is to NEVER EVER allow BM to be the sole reporter about her kids medical infirmities.
You are well within your rights (dh's) to take the child to the doctor anytime, You do not need moms permission.
Dime her out if she is lying in articles for money. That is bs. DIME her out in front of everyone at the activity (not in front of the child) "HEY BM why are you reporting Johnny is disabled THAT IS NEWS to me."
DIME her out. If she is begging for money online. IF she is posting lies on social media, dime her out.
*she may be trying for social security disability for the child. ALSO looking in the future, she may request life line child support IF kid cant support them self because of medical or psychological disability*
If you see something, say something. What is everyone so afraid of???
Unfortunately even though
Unfortunately even though physical custody is 50/50 she has full legal including medical. We can't take him to the doctor without informing her. And she is toeing the line of defamation so we can't go after her for that legally either. We have been open with our concerns both to the court as well as to his doctors and caregivers but without proof of physical harm we are helpless.