I'm so sorry. It's sucks to feel like you're not important.

Maybe it would help to understand it this way: no matter how horrible a BM is, the skids will always put her on a pedestal. Sometimes, the worse the mom, the higher the pedestal. No kid wants to think their mom is worthless, so a lot of them pretend. My skids are the same way, and it reallllly hurts that DH and I do everything for them,while she does nothing and gets all the credit. Hopefully someday they'll pull their heads out of their asses.

I didn't get a "Happy Mother's Day" from either of the skids until DH reminded them. Oh well. I guess that means I don't have to acknowledge them on their special days either.

(((HUGS)))

I feel the same way and just posted a blog about it.

It's really DH's place to say something to SS.

I was raised by my father and SM came into the picture when I was about 11. My dad would always tell me, "don't forget your SM" or give me instruction on what to do. I know as a kid, it was weird for me. She was younger than my dad - closer to my age then his, but I liked her well enough (though her rules seemed crazy for me and Disney Dad :-)).

Anyway, it's the Dad's job to make sure the women are recognized.

I'm sorry

He's also giving her money on mothers day (because that's what she asked for)

Just speechless, that tells us EVERYTHING we need to know about BM!

Your husband should have been the one having a word with his kid about remembering YOU on mothers day. Yes the "child" sounds to be old enough to have had some thought and consideration himself, but he didn't and his dad should have quietly told him that a small acknowledgement (big would be better LOL) of you would be appropriate, sometimes people need the neon sign to tell them the right thing to do.

Sorry you got such shitty treatment.

My wonderful skids (sarcasm does not translate easily in writing) we picked them up from BM at half 4. Instead of saying ANYTHING to me about mothers day I got to hear about how they had seen various BM relatives who they won't be seeing for a while (they are going to Disneyland for a holiday - will be out of the country 16 days - we are in Australia) so the rellies gave them early birthday presents - lots and lots of cash. So picked them up Mothers Day and instead of any word to me I get to spend the rest of the day listening to them both cackle on about what THEY got... Bah humbug. I just didn't speak at all, ignore button was pushed! OH was all over it though, so many questions, wanted to tell him to shut TF up.

I spent Mother's Day with my BD and my 3 SKs. No happy mothers day, nothing. I still made breakfast, cause my MIL showed up unannounced to her my husband look we her breaks... So I made breakfast, cleaned cause asking them to do that is worse than pulling teeth. BTW, SD16, SS13, BD11, SD6. My BD11 is the only one who helped me. Then went out and spent the day together. DId what THEY wanted to do, Which invloved some walking, which I had a broken toe and could barely walk, but I sucked it up. ALL day the SD6 threw tantrums and hit and screamed. Worst mothers day. BM had to work. So Monday she took them after school. Was supposed to have them for the evening. Didnt pick em up till 5pm, ordered Pizza, watched a movie not appropriate for the 6yr old, had them back by 7pm... PLUS SD16 made a big stick about having to get mom something that we couldnt afford. Threw a tantrum. Then when DH jokingly brought up how she never gets him anything, "well mom does more," BIG BLOWOUT! Its 50/50 split. We have them 75 / 25 if not more and pay for EVERYTHING! I've about had it.

Why do we all sit in silence? Men are stupid about such things, you have to tell them/beat them over the head with what you want.

Mother's day is such a weird one for us. The first few years I felt really awkward about the acknowledgement, then it was an acknowledgement by which ever one wanted something, then for a few years after I found out I could not have my own kids I really couldn't stand any acknowledgement. This year my stepson called and said happy mother's day, I was already spending the day with his now 11yo son. We saw Ironman 3. Not the best day, not the wworst. DH truly does not know what to do on that day.

Did not hear a word from the other two sk's. No surprise.

Being a SM is not a well paid job, you get nothing in return (most of the time). Our efforts to make them feel like our kids, are not even noticed.
So, expect nothing from the kids and from DH.
I always take care of my SD, buy what she needs, but I never got a "thank u".
You know you took care of your SS and you are a brave and supporting wife!
Well done for you, for your family and forget about the ungrateful SS.