So Far So Good - DH Has Really Got it Regarding Twit

Forums:

Most of you know my story. After years of carp from Twit I threw H out. Months of counseling, and having to live with the Twit and experience her craziness, mood swings, etc. took the blinders off his eyes.

What is really great about this board is that one can vent without causing problems. I don't get involved with Twit, leave her alone, but DH, well, eventhough he has learned not to let her drag him into her drama, still likes to talk about it to me....share it with me. I wish he wouldn't, but he does as, well he Is just sharing I guess.

So rather than tell him to bug off on the matters, and since he is doing so well, I listen and when it gets to me, I come and talk here. Insights, input, common experiences etc. help get through the rough times.....hey, we are not perfect, but human. But I am not going to backtrack by opening a dialog with DH about Twit's problems....I just let him talk.

Earplugs for that would be

Earplugs for that would be nice, but, well he is doing so well. I guess if telling me is as far as it goes, not blaming me, not wanting us to do something for Twit....fix things for her, etc., I guess I can take it.

As long as I have somewhere to go when it all gets to me.

Guess Twit is still trying to

Guess Twit is still trying to get jr. off the DUI charge. The story is that he wasn't drinking while driving, but only started drinking AFTER he ran off the road....this at 7 a.m. in the morning.

Twit calls DH up regularly telling him her latest trials with jr., how she keeps talking to him, he keeps promising, and then he goes out and drinks again.

Me? Well, I stay out of it and just listen, but as we know, nothing changes when nothing changes and until Twit admits there is a problem and stops bailing jr. out, buying him cars after he crashes them, provides and pays for his lawyers, etc., jr. will just continue to do as he does.

But, what really stressed me out today is that DH came back from dropping the chain saw off at Twit's place. He did it today because they are not home and he doesn't like to encounter her if he can avoid it. Well, when he went into the garage he smelled a very sweet smoky smell. Obviously someone (jr.) had been smoking something.

When he got home he told me about it, and how he checked the garage out and found nothing, just the heavy odor. I told him it was pot. Now, DH has never smoked pot, never smelled it before, etc. I generally don't comment on the jr. situation, but I told him I was not surprised at all by it. And that was all I said (though my humanness wanted to say a lot more I was not going to go down that dark road).

Anyway, DH called Twit to tell her he dropped off the chain saw and what he smelled in the garage. Twit told him that jr. smokes and he probably left some butts in the garage and that was what DH smelled. DH told her that it was obvious that someone was smoking, but it was not regular cigarettes and he did check around to see if there were any butts dropped in the garage (when you have a drunk they don't always dispose of them properly). He said the smell was very sweet, but he didn't tell her it was probably pot.

I listened, said nothing, but from Twit's response I knew that she knew what was going on and wasn't going to admit it to DH because to do so would be admitting that she and her family were not the perfection she likes to brag.