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Separate Holidays ??? Do They Work ??

Sweetnothings's picture

We have adult skids living in a different country, so DH is now moving on to going to visit them alone, or hopefully, that's the plan !! I am disengaged from sd21 stb22 and the younger skid seems to be following sd's tracks a little bit, but as far as I am concerned everyone is big enough now to be responsible for their own choices, etc, etc.

Anyway, do you and your DH do separate holidays ?? He goes to see adult skids, and sgkids, perhaps, and do you do your own thing ?? I have no bios at the moment, so younger kids are not in the picture.

Did you just evolve to this situation, or was it hell on wheels for a while. DH and I plan our own holiday together, but if DH is away and spending thousands on his holiday, I plan to enjoy my freetime too !!!

I'm happy for him to go and visit, it's cheaper than flying them over, though he says he is stopping that shortly.

Does this kind of thing work for you ??

tweetybird74's picture

I only have 1 SS and no bio's. But we usually take 1 family vacation (no so much as SS is 18 now) and DH and I have our own vacation and DH has a vacation with his son alone. This works for us as everyone is happy with this.

Sweetnothings's picture

That sounds good and exactly like where we will try to go... Yet I mentioned this to DH, not rowing, just conversationally when he brought the topic up, and I said separate holidays and the look of shock on his face, you'd think I was trying to serve him up his own liver on a plate !!

tweetybird74's picture

It works well and everyone feels like they get some vaction time together, plus when DH and SS go on their vacation I get the house to myself!!!

sandye21's picture

Exactly! The skids should be accommodated as you would anyone else who does not live within your immediate family circle. SD is banned from our home so thank goodness we won't have a replay of the horrible Christmas 1 year & 1/2 ago. If DH wants to visit her he is free to do so. Minor holidays are OK but Christmas is not.

Sweetnothings's picture

I agree with this. I'm not sacificing DH and I's special time on special dates because of these adults.

I am the planner in our marriage, you know, doing the research, booking things up, DH has a very long intense work schedule, so I do have more free time than him, but that's hardly an excuse when you can just surf the Internet and within fifteen minutes you can book a break or Holiday.

I am not helping him to book up his guilty Dad visit, no, uh uh, not this time, I'm done....

I'm hoping to book my own break when he's away IF he goes, that is, if he sits down and organises it all !! I'm thinking a swanky City Break for me in NY, shopping, sightseeing, hitting all the Museums I love !!! I already have a list on the go, I love traveling !!