That sounds like it sucks. It sounds like there is so much bad blood that no matter what happens dinner is going to go wrong because everyone anticipates it will.

It is not a bad sign when then only thing holding you back from divorce is your dog.

It is very rude of them to not say hello to you and I am sorry that your husband didn't notice they ignored you. Men are not very good at multitasking and it sounds like there was a lot going on at the table.

What would have happened if you said hello to them before they even said hello to your DH?

I love throwing people off and watching them pull it together. For some kids it's hard for them to like the SM because they feel like they are betraying thier BM. So I would be nice because otherwise you are making it easy to be mean to you. I would be sweet as pie and make them, look like asses for being mean to nice person.

Maybe thier reality would change. Try to stay in your marriage, keep yourself and dog happy. Especially, if you don't have to work.

i know the feeling. one of my skids left on bad terms after bad mouthing me. just be happy they dont live under your roof.

Put the dog in a kennel for a while or with your daughter or a friend and leave. Your husband wants to be treated like a God, yet pretends to be totally oblivious of the ignorant way his kids treated you. He knew all right. But as long as they were up his arse and talking to him, it's all good. In fact them hating you makes him feel good about himself. Because he sees they don't treat him like that, so that means they love him. It's all good in his fantasy world.

He needs his kids to hate you to make him think they love him. Bet you think your the one going mad huh. That's what these dysfunctional families do to you. Trust me, it's not you, it's them.

Here is my question- If it were not for the skids how would you feel about your husband? Aside from them being involved how is your relationship?

They are adults now, they don't need to be in your life at all. Not at holidays, not a birthdays, not at dinners. YOU can make the choice to not allow it. If your DH wants to have time to do that he can have that time with them without you AND during a time that doesn't interfere with plans you have made to have nice family time with family that loves all of you.

If DHs are ignored they notice it. I agree with the comment though that they do not always notice your experience of an event like this one. Your DD sounds like a great girl.

Children take their cues ad their boundaries from the parents. If BM is telling them to be mean to you, DH will need to balance by saying that they must be respectful to you and your daughter. My DH did this and says now her regrets not saying it straight away to SD17. The good news is that as soon as he made it clear, her attitude improved overnight. It makes things much easier. She may still feel the same but old fashioned courtesy is so much easier for everyone.

They don't always notice your experience at an event like this one. I would have agreed once, I used to think it's a man thing,women are more sensitive to these things.

For years and I do mean years, my dh claimed he saw and heard nothing. During that time he did however stop speaking to his nephews wife, because, she failed to say hello my him first. FIRST, she sad hello, but he had to say it to her first, he felt insulted by that, and he just ignored her from there on in.

However, I've changed my mind on this, its a man thing. A few months ago he told his psychologist he had heard and seen it all, but he thought if he ignored it, things would get better, and if he said anything to his daughter, well, she'd stop talking to him.

But lets give them the benefit of the doubt and assume they really are blind, deaf and dumb as well as stupid and selfish. They really don't see anything. How does that justify them not addressing their wife's concerns. My dh once complained that a boyfriend of my daughters that we had met twice, didn't say hello to him first (here we go again). I said I hadn't noticed, which was true, we had only seen this kid on two occasions, and dh had never mentioned it before so I could keep an eye on it. What did I do. Did I deny it, accuse him of picking on my daughter,of looking for trouble, of being too sensitive, NO. I rang my daughter, I said listen dh said this,I haven't seen it myself, but he feels strongly about this, so can you make sure if its happening, it doesn't happen again. It never did. Our dhs can and should take the same approach, and for us to excuse them for failing to do this, and even providing them with the excuse, oh well, they're men,is plain wrong.

You are right. I find this whole "Its a man thing." excuse frustrating too.

Maybe its a bit of and egotistical thing? If it is an event where they are basking in the love, adulation and warmth of everyone then they do not notice your very different experience.

It is just not acceptable though to not care about your wife's experience. ebu your words resonate with me. So many times, I have said the exact same thing to my DH. If he said something was not ok, I would simply believe him and ask what I could do or how I could support him. Whenever he has said anything about how anyone has treated him, I have believed him. This is what really upsets me. To not be believed. You are so right.

We do make too many excuses for DHs that failed in some way to have our back. I said that once. "Right now I would not chose you to cover my back in the trenches but you know I have always got yours."

Expecting a "Hello" and for them to be cordial is you "expecting" too much ? I think my adult SD is a loser but I can still say hello. How rude is that of them ? And how dare your DH not step up and say something to them, "hey my spoiled rude brats, you can at least be polite to momof5_1969 you dont have to love her, but you can show her and I that respect as my wife"

I would ask him to pull his pants down and when he asks why, tell him you wondered if his balls were still there. So sorry this happened to you.

I agree stepaside, we contributed to it all by putting up with it all. Still, better to learn the lesson late, than never. Some people never learn.

I do wonder how different it all could have been if the first time it happened we'd stood up to our husbands and said, allow your kids to treat me like that again and I'll throw them it with you right behind them.

Where we went wrong, we gave dh and his spawn too many chances, we did it because we loved our husbands, wanted them to be happy,but no matter the reason, the outcome was, we accepted it for so long it became normal and acceptable for them to treat us like that before we knew it, our self esteem was shot, we became anxious and were too afraid to say anything for fear of the ensuing fight with DH our confidence was totally eroded and by then, there was no way there was ever going to be a polite, civil, respectful relationship with the steps, let alone a "blended" family. They never wanted it from before they ever met us, and we had taken so much shit for them we'd justified in their minds why they had no respect for us. We were stupid. They were right.

I get the sense with this lot here they know that weak little baby worm, has turned into a man eating python and they'd best stay well hidden,

EBU , you said that sooo very well!

Sounds like you are married to my husband. I lived with that for 8 years. My dh blamed me for it all. He heard nothing his daughter said, saw nothing she did. I exaggerated it, made it up, was looking for trouble blah blah. Long story. But I banned his daughter from my life and home 2 years ago. She stopped her brothers so dad has no family now. That in her mind will show him.

I told her to get and DH to get with her. That was when he realised I was done, finished, over it.

So he then in a desperate attempt to
Save the marriage goes off to see a psychologist. On one of those visits I was present. He bloody well told that therapist that I had tried for years to make it work with her. That his daughter wanted nothing to do with me. That his daughter had indeed been doing and saying all the things I was stressed about. All the things he denied for years.

They don't change, you have to. They don't support you until they think you really are going. If they
Don't support you at that point. They are never going to.

My DH note went from blaming me to blaming her. Didn't and doesn't blame himself at all. See, they never change. You however can. If you feel the fear and do it anyway.

My husband is a narcissist. It's hell to live with. His daughter. Well, it's more than narcissism there. You cannot survive the narcissist, without developing some serious self respect for yourself. Without putting some very strong, not up for negotiation boundaries in place.
No dog is worth losing your sanity and peace of mind. The dog is you making excuses to
stay.

Tog, it's a full time job. But fir some inexplicable reason I've been blessed. I have the upper hand now. The tankes have turned and he cannot destroy me anymore. I am well aware of what he does and how he operates. But narcissists are bullies to. As always standing up to the bully is the only way to disarm them.

Oddly, I have learned to value myself more now. I have self esteem and a new found confidence in myself. I know with or without him, I will be okay. It is so much easier now I know what he is and what I'm dealing with. I guess the narcissist in him has gone into charm mode as he wants to keep his marriage. My job now is to never give him control again. To always keep him in charm mode by keeping him at arms length. That distance I have put between us is what is keeping us together. It is what keeps him in control. Perhaps one day he will get sick of trying to win and leave. But that's okay. I will be fine. Meantime I am happy with my home and family and time gives me greater financial security.

I would not wish this life on anyone. This man was my everything, my soul mate. I would have taken a bullet for him. It used to be I couldn't wait for him to come home. Not so now, he killed that. I still love him, I don't think you could live this life if you didn't feel love for your partner at some level. But if I hadn't married him,if I hadn't taken those vows of in sickness and in health, if I had known the true him before I married, I would never have married him. But married we are, and as long as he can treat me with respect and with the help of his antidepressants keep his depression and anxiety, therefore temper under control, married we will stay. But this is my last trip on this merry go round, if he reverts back, I think it would be time to get off, married or not.

Your author friend obviously sees this clearer than you do. It's not a little bit different at all. Your DH is the one doing it to you. He is actually worse than his children. He took vows to love and honour you, his children didn't. They could hate you with a passion, he should make damn sure that you, as his wife are not isolated, ignored and humiliated. He doesn't. His failure to address this sends a message loud and clear to his kids that he agrees with them, they see him say and do nothing, they see him accept their treatment of you, and they take that as encouragement. You are being emotionally abused by your husband. He has betrayed you. He believes you should shut up and take this so his kids will like him. Nice husband you have there. I know what's going on and what your going through. My dh put me through all the same stuff. Your dh is your problem, not his kids. He could stop them in a heartbeat IF HE WANTED TO. But he wants them to like him, and he cares about that more than he cares about the fact his children are treating you in this shameful manner. He thinks if he says anything to them, they won't talk to him, so he is willing to let you pay the price so he can get what he wants, if that means allowing them to treat you like shit. That's fine by him. That is abuse, emotional abuse, which can have far more detrimental affects on your health and mind than most people could ever imagine. But your husband sees the impact this is having on you, and doesn't lift a finger to stop it, to support you. That is not how you treat a spouse that you are supposed to love. You are being bullied by them, sent to Coventry, it is an awful feeling and your husband, your life partner, the one person who is supposed to love and protect you, well, he's sitting idly by, getting attention from his children and his silence on this, is what keeps them going. This is absolutely all your husbands fault. He cannot be responsible for what they do, but he is responsible for allowing it. The stress from this has made you ill, ruined your body, mind and career, what's he done, nothing. That is abuse. Read that book with open eyes. It's not his kids, it's him.

Can you get some disability? Perhaps with some disability coming in might give you more options such as moving out. I know that a lot of women stay in these situations because they don't know how to make it on their own, and I'm assuming that's maybe having some influence on your decision to stay with your DH and let him and his kids disrespect you. I think one Op suggested you move in with your parents but you said you couldn't take your dog. I'd put him in a kennell and move with your parents until you can sort things out and get a place of your own.

I think if your husbands idea of Christianity is to raise and support children who behave like this to others. Then your husband has lost the plot. Where in any bible does it say, thought shall make thy fathers wife feel like a leper. Your husband has once again totally ignored you and your feelings, turned all of this around and made it ALL YOUR FAULT. If you would just forgive, his kids could keep this behaviour up and all would be great. Your husband is a narcissist, your husband is a failure as a husband and a father. He has raised his children in a very un Christian manner. And instead of addressing that, he tells you to turn the other cheek. Can you imagine if you or someone in your family treated him or his children in this manner. No way on Gods earth would your husband turn the other cheek. The true Christian way of life is to treat others as you would like to be treated. Is this the kind of treatment they want. Your husband is emotionally and verbally abusing you. That is far from being a Christian. The only way for you to survive this is to stop it. Stand up to your husband, tell him, this happens again, and he fails to deal with it, you will, and DO IT. Your home is your sanctuary, a place of peace, a place where you are supposed to be safe. As a Christian your husband should be treating you as one of God's children, he should be adhering to his marriage vows and honouring his wife, and he certainly spared the rod and spoilt the child didn't he. He is a hypocrite. Hs Christian values are the ones that need to be brought into question, not yours. I am appalled.

Oh by the way, he's not dense about this. He knows he and his kds are in the wrong. That's why he gets defensive. But he doesn't want things to change, so he has to bully you into submission, he will shout, yell, scream and blame you, in a desperate attempt to keep things the way they are. He's not dense, no way. He's manipulative and narcissistic.

My husband stopped talking to his nephews wife because she
didn't say hello to him first. Never spoke to her at all over that. His daughter could waltz in here not say hello or goodbye to me not answer me when I'd offer her tea or coffee and a zillion other things. No Worries, that's all good. So what. It was all my fault for having a problem with it. When I'd point out how he felt when he wasn't spoken to first. You know what. He'd ignore me, he'd walk away or change the subject or yell louder, whatever he could do to take the focus off the truth.

Stepaside if you find the need to ban her, do so with a clear conscience and a light heart. It really isn't us, it's them, no matter what our husbands would like us to believe. It's them and their fathers who feign ignorance. I put up with it for 8 years, then banned her two years ago. Has she seen the error of her ways. realised that her smart alec attitude has cost her a father. Her child a grandfather. No, it has not. It has only caused her to involve her grandfather who will be 90 next year. He now has no relationship with DH, his only son. It is 19 months since we have seen him. We probably will never see him again now.

The moral of the story. These women are pure evil. Not happy unless they are destroying relationships. If you ban them from your life, no matter, it doesn't hurt them and it doesn't change them. They just find another relationship to destroy.

It won't change how they feel about you. When they have hated the very idea of you long before they ever met you. It is never going to be any different. People with that kind nof personality are INCAPABLE of change. Until we step out of their lives, ban them from our homes and our lives, stop being there to be the target of their abuse, the butt of their jokes, and leave all of that for daddy, to cop, then daddy will never admit they are less than perfect. Once they don't have us to target, the frustration of that causes them to turn on daddy. Then see how long daddy puts up with it.

They can only behave like this for as long as we let them. We need to get the notion that they are his kids, our kids, step kids or grand kids out of our head. That word kids is what causes us to keep trying to make it work. That word kids is why we make excuses for their behavior. That word kids keeps us locked in an abusive situation for years and years. These people are nobody's kids. They are fully grown men and women now. They cannot be moulded or shaped. They cannot learn from modeling good behavior. They are who they are now. They are happy with who they are, if they weren't, they'd want to change, we wouldn't have to keep trying to get them to change, to be civil to us and their fathers. This is who they are now. As with any other adult, if you don't like them, if they are rude or
Dismissive towards you. Walk away, don't have them in your home. And don't do it for your husband because they are his kids. They are ADULTS.

MOMOF5_1969 Very Interesting Post From Lady G on the blog Forgiving Skids. Your husband might want to take this Christian perspective instead of the self serving one he has.

Submitted by LadyG on Fri, 09/27/2013 - 2:41am.
Yesterday, I talked to a priest about forgiveness of my brother and sinister in law in regards to the baggage I was carrying for the damage they've done to me. I want to better myself and better my life by putting my past behind me and going on without my dysfunctional family.

The priest told me that if someone does NOT ask for forgiveness, then it is not for you to forgive. If they do forgive, forgive them but please watch out to see if they are sincere enough to change and to be the person you wish for them to be to you, your spouse, and others. If they do not change and are trying to appease you, you have the right to hold them accountable for their behavior and ask them to leave (if they are old enough to be on their own).

Parents, no matter who they are, need to step up and BE parents, not friends to their children. Parents are afraid due to the guilt of the divorce. The deed has been done-the children need to get over it and learn how to get along with people who are sincere in helping them. If the skids are being unruly and the parent doesn't step up to do their job, with it being you home, you have a right to put that child in their place. I don't care-you live their too and no one has to put up with anyone's crap.

Well, can you and dh just go out for the night, dinner, a movie and an vernight stay in town perhaps. But d tell dh the truth. Your not prepared to put up with it. So, either you just invite the boys, and he tells her why. Or you two go out but you really need to put an end to this. If he chooses to share his birthday with his daughter. Than he could take his children out to dinner and you stay home. Or you could stay overnight with your parents. There are options. None of them easy. But you do have to make change. Trust me, he won't. You do realise this s killing you, taking years off your life, and making what life you do have totally miserable. It's up to you to change this. The birthday coming up is a good opportunity to show dh and his daughter your not playing their game anymore. It's not easy to take a stand. I know. But what's the very worst thing that could happen. Dh leaves you. If he would really leave you because his daughter treats you like crap and you can't take it anymore. Then you have lost nothing worth having.

I am so sad by the amount of SM who are so fed up, we are willing to just walk away from our homes, marriages etc because of this crap. So sad. (yes, I am one who will give it up, if things don't change)

It's not as if they walk away with nothing ill firedog, the courage emotional, physical and mental courage that it takes to walk away, is something that money could never buy. It will serve them so very well in the future. They have learnt life lessons in this crap that they could never learn anywhere. But they have become stronger, wiser women who have finally learnt to value themselves. They won't be making this mistake again.

ebu writes "You do realise this is killing you, taking years off your life, and making what life you do have totally miserable. It's up to you to change this."

OK how is this for a caring slam in the face. I have this friend and mentor who is 20 years older than me. This friend said to me last week. "You are not you anymore. I only see glimmers of the old you. You are letting this teenage narcissist into your head. Stop it. Come back to us."

I know I look older and fatter. These two things are just symptoms of the internal turmoil.

So I will look to other people here like you momof5 to get your act together with me. OK? We need to practice disengagement and stay mentally in a place where we are brave enough to walk away. Let the skids buzz around in their negative sad little lives. Forget them.

Momof5 I so get the tiredness you feel. It in part is due to depression. The first step would be for you to accept that you are depressed. Whether or not that needs medication is something only you can decide. I suffered depression about 20 years ago, was on antidepressants for 18 months. After that I knew the warning signs. Throughout all the drama, I was very aware of the fact that if I wasn't careful I could find myself back there again. Fortunately I had a fantastic psychologist back then and she had taught me great skills, which I worked hard to apply throughout that ordeal. My GP offered a few times to put me back on antidepressants, but I felt that I would have become more angry and resentful if I had to take medication because my husband couldn't care less how his kids treated me, worse still, sat back allowed it, then, defended or denied it to the point I thought I was going insane.

In order to start looking after you, you need to ACCEPT what you know to be true. You have no control over how your husband or his children behave. Fighting with your husband over this, is an ongoing losing battle. He is NEVER going to change. Why should he. He is happy with the status quo. His kids are talking to him. That's all he wants. Like a naughty child looking for attention, it doesn't matter if it's good or bad attention, he just wants it. So, no matter if they treat you or him like crap, he's happy. He sees no need to upset the apple cart. Worse, what he sees is, YOU trying to upset the apple cart he is fighting so hard to maintain, you are the problem, you are constantly whinging and whining and nagging him about his kids. If you would just shut up, his life would be perfect. All you need to do is let his kids treat you like dog poo on the soles of their feet, make you feel like a leper in your own home, and say nothing. If YOU did that, everyone would be happy. See, it is all your fault, and even though he knows in his head this is BS, in his heart he desperately wants to force you into submission so he can keep his kids. In short he's SELFISH. This is not a good way to have raised his kids, it's not in their best interests to think it is acceptable to treat anyone this way, let alone their fathers wife. It's killing you. But your dh can only see how it impacts on him. What he will lose if he admits to the truth about his offspring. So he denies it, defends it, makes you the cause and blame for it, and makes you think your going insane. If you don't change what your doing, this will never end.

How to change you. Get medical help for your depression if you need it. Decide what YOU REALLY WANT. If staying married means so much to you that you will continue to live like this no matter what. That you are literally going to cling onto your husband to the grave then, you need to do exactly what he says, put up with his kids without complaint, and everytime something happens,instead of internalizing it, and making yourself I'll over it, remind yourself, it's what you want, being married is worth it, and be happy you are married.

Or! If you really can't do this anymore. Stop doing it. You don't have to leave him. But, yes,you changing yourself, saying no more, and standing up for yourself, may cause him to leave you. What do you want. Is it a husband at all costs, no matter how sick and sad that makes you. Or is it a healthy, happy peaceful life free from this kind of abuse. And you are being abused, make no mistake about that.

How do you change. You decide what's more important to you and work towards that. If Its him, you say nothing about his kids, smile and be happy you have what means the most to you, him. Accept in order to have him, you have to have the abuse. If it's you, and a life of peace, stop it. Ban his kids, well, the daughter actually, you don't have to ban the sons if they are ok to you. I only banned the daughter, she in turn stopped her brothers from coming here and they listened to her. That's fine. They're adults, they can makes their own choices. Stop caring about how she feels or would feel if you did this. She cares nought about you, and to be fair, you along with your husband are also teaching her it's okay to treat you like this. You are doing nothing to stop it, you are accepting it. Stop accepting it.

She no longer comes to your home, you no longer attend functions where she will be. Your husband can suck it up, or he can leave he has choices too. But he should not have the choice to put you through this. Only you can take that power away from him, because you, like myself and many others here, you gave him that power in the first place. He has abused that power, abused your loyalty abused your support and abused your love. Not being content with that, he is abusing you, and encouraging others to do so also.

It got so bad for me, I had to stop it. I faced the ugly truth about my husband and my marriage. I realised my fear of losing him was what was keeping me trapped in that hell. In accepting the truth about the man I loved so much, I got the courage to face that fear, and say, no more, she is out of my life and my home, you dh, are free to go with her. But I will no longer put up with her, and I will not live with you being angry with me because I will not be abused, insulted, isolated and ignored by her.

He is stil here. But I don't care. He can leave if he wants to, I'm not afraid anymore. With or without him, I will be fine.

The fear is trapping you in this. As they say, feel the fear, and do it anyway. Can things really be any worse for you. I thank God everyday for the courage he gave me that day to tell that woman, no more, you have been trying to make an enemy of me for 8 years now, now you have accomplished that, you have your wish. You are no longer welcome in my home, if you ever come back here again, I will have you charged with trespass. That was two years ago last August. I don't know how my legs held me up that day, I honesty don't. I was shaking inside with fear. Fear of her, fear of what my husband was going to do about it. I was nauseous with the fear. But I did it thanks be to God, anyway. That was the beginning of my new life. Fist step, look long, hard and deep into yourself and ask yourself, WHAT DO YOU REALLY WANT.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with just one step. I, given a choice would have opted to walk that thousand miles in bare feet if it was going to effect change in the situation. But at the end of that journey, all that would have changed was my geographical location. I would just have been the same old me, somewhere else. I would have taken what I now know to be the easy way out. Facing my fears and banning her that day, was the beginning of my journey to personal growth and development. It was by far a much, much harder journey. One at most times I wasn't sure I'd survive. But once I had taken that first step I knew there was no going back. To say okay, ill give her another chance, was to take even more abuse until I eventually would have to sign the divorce papers, because both she and my husband would have seen that weakness in me. They would have devoured me after that. I had no choice but to keep fighting for my emotional survival. And anyway, what at that point did I have to lose. A man who loved another woman more than me, and justified that by calling her his daughter. That knowledge is what kept me going. Funny, fear of losing dh, got me into that mess, and it was fear that got me out, fear that I was becoming so physically ill I would die and because I had accepted my husbands abuse, leave behind 3 lovely children, and 3 gorgeous grandchildren. Then it was fear that kept me going and gave me the strength to stand up for myself, to not give in to the pressure. Fear that if I did, it would all be so much worse than it had ever been before. Fear I see now can be a good thing when used wisely, fear is healthy. It is there to protect you, so respect that healthy fear, feel it, and use it to bring you to a healthier and happier place.

Lovely stuff. I shed a tear or two reading this. Don't dare tell me that we are not all turning into women of iron as we progress on this journey. Fear of letting my own child down whilst this spoilt young woman sucks the life out of my home is driving me on a happier and healthier path. I want my son to think of this happy healthy mummy who was fun and a great role model for the type of strong woman he wants to hang out with.

I knew a step mother years ago. Here's the really exciting thing, I thought she was a glamorous happily married, beautiful, charismatic woman. She was the Aunty of my University boyfriend and I knew her as a host of wonderful family parties. I ran into her recently and we caught up. She realised that I was now a step parent of a teenage girl. She shared that she was a step parent of teenage girls and how narcissistic, negative and horrible they had been.

I was gobsmacked. How did she do it? Her rules for were;

- He could see his daughters any time he wanted but they could only be in their home 3 days a fortnight
- Events with her family and friends were sacred and the girls were not invited to attend
- He was free to go alone to their special events - 18th, 21st, weddings
- and she said most importantly "drink champagne and glide through the middle of it all smiling."

Got to love the lady's style. She found out years later that they referred to her as "that bitch" through the whole period of time (a decade) and she says that she does not have a moment's guilt about the boundaries she established.

I have had the tough discussion with my husband recently that it is unreasonable to constantly expect my SD17 to just "sit in" on my catch ups with friends and families.

Something has changed in the power structure in my home since I decided internally that she is not allowed to intrude on my right to catch up with friends and family at any cost and that I am willing to ban her if she is out of line. Yes I have changed but I did fall into one hell of a hole before I started regaining my strength and then some. Watch this space.

Lost 1kg this week. Got through 2nd round interviews for a great job. Went to gym 6 days out of 7. Come on ladies! You are all inspirational in your own way! Lets band together and sort this out. One victory a week and one small win a day will do.

My DH said to me 3 months back that he was afraid that I would be happier single! Fear turns out to be a good thing for men too. I said honestly that I have never known the joy of the love of a man that I have known with him. I said also that I had not been ready for SD and all that she brought with her. I said firmly that her parenting up to the age of 14 was not my responsibility and that I felt that he requires me to somehow turn up and change his daughter by osmosis and that that is statistically impossible. He went quiet. The dynamic is changing at our place.

Share your one small win today or victory this week.

I have said before momof5 he gets it all right. Never doubted that. That is the biggest most serious most insulting and humiliating part of all this. They get it, they see it, they know it's wrong, they know they would never allow anyone to treat them the way their kids treat us, yet they still get angry with us for not sitting back and taking this. If his daughter were being nice to you and you treated her the way she treats you. I guarantee you, his response to her would not be to act like a Christian and turn the other cheek, nor would he hesitate to tell you in no uncertain terms it's not in, she is his daughter and you need to treat her with respect. Hell, he tells you to do that now and your not doing anything wrong. Sorry, but the fact THEY GET IT just makes it all worse and is more disrespectful towards us.

It is VERY ODD that he pulls the Christian attitude with you. Makes you feel bad and makes you question your Christianity over your feelings towards her, yet he can come out with a statement like that. If she wasn't his daughter he'd have nothing to do with her. Well she's not your daughter. So have nothing to do with her if that's the Christian thing to do in his eyes, then he has nothing to complain about.

It's time he told his daughter he feels like that. It might just wake her up.