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What happens after a COC is filed?

pseudo_stepmom's picture
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(this is my first post, so bear with me please)

My DH is filing a contempt of court (order?) against BM because for the past 2 years, she has only let him see his 4 children every other weekend from friday at 330pm til sunday at 7pm. No other days. No 2 weeks uninterrupted during summer or christmas vacation....she was WAAAYYY off on even meeting the required state minimum of visitation.

She also requests that the children call their new step-dad "dad", which has been pissing my husband off and making the children uncomfortable. (Which i guess has nothing at all to do with this post/forum, sorry...got a little off topic here)

She found out that he was going to take her to court over this, because he let her know if she did not let him see them more, he would not pay her child support ($1100/month) for two months so he could save for an attorney. She jumped right on the bandwagon and took him to court for contempt of not paying child support. I know this was a dumb move now, as our lawyer has already mentioned to us that in the court's eyes, cs and visitation are two completely different issues.

We do have a stack of e-mails from BM saying that the only reason why she won't let him see his children more often is because she wants this ridiculously high (false) amount of money he supposedly owes her for back alimony, and because he is of satan. Really. She honestly thinks he is influenced by the devil and makes bad choices that are not in the best interest of their children (she is a crazy religious mormon and my husband is not).

So, pretty much what I'm asking is if anyone has gone through this process and what could be the possible outcomes of going to court? Will the courts slap her wrist for not letting him see his children for AT LEAST the minimum of the state requirements, or will she get an actual punishment? He is asking for more visitation, 8 weeks total, in addition to friday at 330pm til tuesday morning every other weekend.

GoodbyeNormaJean's picture

If there is a court order, and she is refusing to abide by it, the court can fine her, assign a custody investigator...a whole bunch of stuff.

If there is no CO, you basically don't have a leg to stand on.

If she continues to defy an existing court order, and your husband can prove that he has continued to make every effort exercise his parental rights, he can petition for the judge to amend custody on the grounds that she habitually interferes with court ordered visitation.

pseudo_stepmom's picture

Uhm...well, they never went to court when they got divorced, but the papers give him the absolute state minimum of friday after school at 330pm til sunday at 7pm with an additional day during the week that she has NEVER once allowed him to have.

About 3 years ago she let him have them from friday til monday morning, every other weekend, when he took them to school, then she decided to go through ORS to get her cs and alimony payments when she met her new husband...which is when all of the drama started. Her new husband does not have any visitation with his own daughter now because the ex-wife, and his daughter does not want a thing to do with his new religion...I have my suspicions that since he was treated so poorly with regards to the court system and his own daughter, that he is informing BM of how to f-over DH...if that makes sense. ??

skylarksms's picture

We took our BM to court for contempt for not making one of two skids come for visitation (why? who knows what crazy thinks!).

I think H missed about 20(?) visits with SD.

The judge ordered BM to pay $500 for Contempt and chewed her out.

Although it didn't change things much, it DID keep BM from continually taking H to court (which she had been doing since he started dating me).

pseudo_stepmom's picture

She is also supposed to let him have 4 weeks of time during summer vacation and christmas break and has never once allowed this. The holidays are all screwed up too...

NavyChiefWife's picture

Im sorry to say but it all depends on the judge. We have a list a mile long of what my skid's BM has done against the CO but the judge has only given her warnings and a "slap on the wrist". Now we will be going before a new judge (yay!) and our attorney says he's very fair and pro-father. We are filing contempt on her for everything she's done, including the 6 new things she did just today.

If a judge finds that a parent IS in contempt they can be warned, forced to pay fines, jailed, or the custody could be changed. Like I said before, its all up to the judge and how he thinks and feels that day.