But I'm also not sure the basis for your BF seeking primary custody. And I'm not sure what you were a "witness" to exactly.

When it comes to my husband's court proceedings pertaining to his ex-wife and their children, I'm usually sitting at a bar or at home relaxing my nerves with a bottle of wine. I know my opinion is not necessary nor is it valued by anyone in the courtroom, well except of course my husband. So, for them to call you as a witness, I would think that your BF's lawyer would have a decent reason (like colaborating your BF's version of a story or witnessing physical abuse or whatever) otherwise....I don't see the need to take part in it if you don't feel comfortable doing so.

"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley

I have to go. My DH needs me to sit there and hold his hand and sometimes I have to squeeze the crap out of it to keep him from jumping up and screaming at the looney BM. She comes up with some doozies!

I would go if they are asking you to. I can appreciate that Cruella didn't go but every situation is different. It's not like you are going for a front row seat of the action. You could wait outside until you are needed to testify and when you are done you can go back outside that way they can't sit there and focus on you. Iif she chooses to do that there is nothing you can do about it anyway.

I was integral in the case, and our lawyer wanted us both there. But BM conceded before we even got to see the inside of a courtroom. I was never sure if I would have been allowed back, although our attorney expressed my desire to be there to the GAL and she felt I was a major factor in her decision to grant us custody, so she said she would recommend I come back. Like I said it never came to that.

I am of a different opinion than some in this. If it was just to modify CS or visitation I would not have gone. BUT...because we were suing a hostile BM for custody, and the psychologist and the GAL both expressed in their reports that I was a factor in the decision, I felt I should be there.

I think too whenever the SM or SF is held accountable for a child's well being they should have a right to be party to the proceedings. For instance, a friend of mine's ex sued her for increased visitation, less CS AND to have their daughter removed from his insurance (or lack there of) and added to her SF's insurance. The court ordered the SF had to put his SD on his insurance, yet he was not allowed in the court room. I see this as a great injustice to Sparents. We are held accountable but have no rights? The laws are changing on this one. Hopefully it will happen in time for some of us custodial step parents to see evidence of it.

“I never gave away anything without wishing I had kept it; nor kept it without wishing I had given it away.” ~Louise Brooks

with that. I went to court once with Bf and that was last time. His ex hates me with a passion and can not look at me without lunging at me. Last time i saw her which was years ago she physically attacked me. Which resulted in yet another court hearing. Dysfunction a game the whole family plays!