Wow the fight went a way I didn't expect.
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Ok so I've been having these thoughts lately about how I have my SS all the time while he's here and I take care of him feed him bathe him clothe him all that jazz. And honesty I dot mind it my DH is at work and I feel like its te least I can do. But when he comes home he could spen more time with him. Quality father son time ya know. And I brought that up and he flipped and said he would just take him back to his BMs house tomorrow after work then bc I always throw it up in his face that I'm the one taking care of him while he's here. Now we're not speaking at the moment. I'm very angry and hurt.
I know I have tried to keep
I know I have tried to keep my mouth shut but you know how it is when you bite your tongue for so long you get mad enough and it all comes out. I just couldn't anymore. My SS is 4 and I love him to death. Honestly I don't mind to care for him one bit. I have done so much to try to get him with us. Keeping my mouth shut to the BM (appropriate abbreviation btw) and even quit my job so I could be available to watch him when we can get him. My DH works 5-6 days a week sometimes 12 hour days. I do not in any way want to mandate his time with his son but I've tried waiting I'm hoping if I bring it to his attention maybe he will and no I doubt he will really take him to BM I think he just said it to me bc he's mad. Being a SM is so hard though. It's hurtful from so many directions. Loving a kid the way i love SS and knowing his BM tries to have him hate me and just the spiteful things he does. And I know it's bc he is confused. He tells me he loves me and kisses me all the time. But still I can't help but feel like I'm just playin a role that isn't mine and that he will hate me later on and it will break my heart even more.
"Keeping my mouth shut to the
"Keeping my mouth shut to the BM (appropriate abbreviation btw)"
^^^ ROFLMFAO
Thanks for the giggle
Lol couldn't resist. Why not
Lol couldn't resist. Why not say what I think while I can lol. }:)
Yea we discussed it more free
Yea we discussed it more free we both cooled down. Honestly he's not a bad father I think he just needs to realize quality time is important. Like many other dads out there. Hopefully he listened to me an starts taking it to heart
I know. I guess for now I
I know. I guess for now I will cross my fingers and pray that all this works the way it should. Thank you so much for your kind words. I found this site today and it is wonderful! Nobody understands how hard of a job being a SP is. Until you are one. It is a hard thing to do but it can be wonderful. I am only 22 and have no children of my own so this is even harder for me then if I had BC of my own. My first attempt at parenting is parenting another woman's child. Which hopefully will make me a better person and mother.
his blowing up at you is
his blowing up at you is proof that he does not appreciate what you do for his son. my dh and i have had a few of these blow ups. i do something for his kid and it's not good enough. i quit doing ANYTHING for the kid until dh understands what i mean. then it's good for awhile and then he starts taking advantage of me again. i tell you, when you stop doing and then start again (after dh understands that this is NOT your kid and you are doing a FAVOR for them and appreciation is required), the appreciation starts flowing again. UNTIL you allow them to turn you into a doormat again. women really have to be on guard because we do so much for so many. learn the word NO sometimes. it works miracles.
Cocoa I know what you mean!
Cocoa I know what you mean! In the beginning he was appreciative and all the time telling me how happy he is watching me be so good with SS and now it seems like its just expected of me. I provide discipline as well as everything else. Which is fine bc If I'm watchin him while DH is at work then I need to have discipline but I feel like I would like to be appreciated and acknowledged for all I do.
Sheldon fan I know what you mean too. Men are crazy they think they can just delegate everything and it will all be fine. That's why mothers are so important in kids lives. Men are just completely clueless half the time