I have noticed a lot of posters have the same issue. Not enough alone time, or not having quality alone time due to their partner’s preoccupation with the skids. Having SS full time, the idea of alone time is pretty much chalked up to nostalgia. What makes a huge difference in my situation is DH’s attitude about alone time. Even though rarely have it, he understands the need for it and is apologetic that we don’t get it often. He doesn’t view me as a selfish person for wanting it, and understands a relationship requires care and focus outside of how the marriage relates to his son. So I have a lot less resentment that there isn’t alone time.

I’m curious to hear from others if you think you would be less angry over your situation if your partner had a different attitude about alone time, even if you don’t get to have it?

What also helps is that I’m the type of person who has no problem at all spending quality time with myself. If I’m feeling too overwhelmed, or need to be alone I will leave and treat myself to something fun or relaxing. Or I just don’t go home from work until after I’ve had sufficient time to unwind.

Even if the skid isn’t a monster, it’s comforting to know exactly what you are going to go home to everyday, and losing that control over your environment is why I believe a lot of Steps are resentful. If you are a Step full time and don’t have the circumstances for your home to be a haven, I think it’s important to still find your haven somewhere, at some point every day or else you are going to be miserable and/or go insane.

Time by yourself is important, and doesn’t have to feel lonely. At least it doesn’t to me.