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SS6 finally let BM's plan slip, and then BM all but confessed *long*

Auberry2's picture

Well, it has been a while since I was here, but we have had major drama and I needed to vent.

We have been having huge problems with SS6 acting out against me, being physically violent with me, and even his father at times, and blaming everything he does on my DS8. (Literally everything is my DS's fault according to SS6, no matter how impossible it was for him to have done it) We had a feeling, because of the words he was using, that BM put him up to the behaviors. Usually it would go something.like this: SS6 goes to visit Lazy McCrazy, the next day she calls DH to tell him what is "bothering" their son, SS6 comes home from visitation spouting his mother's words verbatim and acting out like crazy. In all of these situations SS6 had not once, ever expressed these thoughts or actions prior to his mother announcing they were a problem.

Well, we had an incident where SS6 bit me, badly enough to bruise my hand, and DH sat him down to talk to him (DH's favorite thing to do, since discipline isn't his strong point) and at some point during the talk SS6 blurts out "But daddy, I have to be mean to Auberry, mommy says if I can be mean enough to her, then she will leave and it will be just you and me and mommy again" DH called BM and she basically owned the statement, brazen hussy that she is. She told DH how SS6's bad behaviors are all his fault because he kicked her out and then had the nerve to end up moving on and marrying someone else.

I was flabbergasted. Who in their right mind does things like this to their own child? I suppose my answer is in the above sentence, because Lazy McCrazy is never in her right mind. The only reason she gets visitation is because Texas is a mom state. It makes me sick, to think that a mother would mess with a kid's mind like this.

She never even wants to see SS6, she spends most of her time coming up with excuses NOT to see him. She is always too sick or too tired or too poor to have him at her house. She never comes to school functions, never comes to ball games, nothing. All she wants is for DH to let her move back in so she won't have to do what little bit of work she does now to survive and she can go back to neglecting SS6 full time.

herewegoagain's picture

Most of them are indeed crazy...

PS - although sometimes I wonder if we aren't as well cause not sure that I have it all together that I stayed in such a crazy situation :?

Auberry2's picture

Oh, I am fairly certain I am my own brand of nuts for being in this mess. LOL. (A jelly bean of a different flavor as my mother used to say)

Step-Volgirl's picture

Poorlilttle guy! I'll never understand how a woman can be so emotionally abusive to her own kid!?!? Fortunately, you guys at least know where all the bad behavior is coming from. Hopefully, your SS will be able to understand that you're not going anywhere anytime soon - and that with or without you, BM is not welcome back!

Auberry2's picture

DH had a long talk with him and a short but very firm talk with BM and laid down how things are. I feel bad for SS6 though, because she is just so unnatural with him.

sbm014's picture

Hearing things like this is just so sad. My BM doesn't get SS5 to act out but in the past we caught her telling him to say "Well my mom does this" or "My mom gets to spend more time with me" trying to jade the truth-- mind you DH works offshore so I may see SS at sports but not much, and his dad doesn't see him for three weeks straight, but he is trying to get a onshore job within the next couple years once all of our moving is settled.

BM has also will still tell SS about when her and daddy were together even on the phone with him when he is at our house like "Oh y'all went and did that - you know daddy and I took you to one once" It is just ridiculous for her to live in the past and to bring that up upon a 5 year old - why not let him have his experiences here and create your own at your house and move on.

BM's are nuts.

jumanji's picture

Actually...The other parent would get visitation regardless. No mater the state, no matter the gender. The parent you describe may not be stellar, but will still get visitation.