My step son, the hater
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My ss is 8 and never has anything good to say about anyone, even his sister. His sister is learning to read and I say good job and he keeps pointing out that she can’t read(she’s 4). He talks trash about everyone. Made fun of his aunts hair behind her back, his grandmas weight, even said in front of family members that his bio mom can’t cook. Normally I would find it amusing but no one is safe from this 8 year olds needs for attention at other people’s expense. His dad never corrects him but I do. I do it by taking up for the people he makes fun of, even his pathetic bio mom. I don’t understand this type of personality/ behavior from a child. Even to pick on his sister for not reading fat enough seems harsh and mean. Maybe I’m wrong?
Sounds like he has low self
Sounds like he has low self-esteem and an inferiority complex, and this is his way to make himself feel like he's better than others.
How's his relationship with BM?
My SS8 is a hater, too. He's learning at the foot of the master, his mother. DH's therapist is convinced that BM is severely Narcissistic personality disordered. SS is her golden child, so he does no wrong, while SD is her scapegoat for everything. (The bias is 100% evident, even to SS.) He likes being in that position, so he does whatever it takes to keep Mom happy, which means replicating her behavior.
You are not wrong at all.
If anything I would say that you need to step up the consequences. Start giving his ear a twist and marching him to the nearest corner to stand there until you get tired.
Any snarky mean crap... ear... corner... lather, rinse, repeat. Doesn't matter where it occurs put him in the corner. The more public and embarrassing the location the better. If DH or any other family member takes exception tell them that they can step up and get it done before you have to and if they don't step up they can bite their tongues while you do the adulting.
Agree with eastfacingwindow!
My 11yr old SS would TRY to be rude when coming back from his mother's house. He would snap at us, rude remarks, attitude up the ***! and each time we need to remind him that at this house we do not speak to eachother this way and we will respect eachother. Once I've had to result to "you are being really annoying!" This really hit home as he calmed down, collected himself and came to give me a hug. His way of apologizing.