Need some advice from the board on this one. Without going into too much detail, I have a SD17 who is a real handful. I **live** for summer, because she goes to see her perfect bio-daddy for 7 weeks, and DW and I actually get some time togther. DW is a permissive "friend" parent, but has gradually started to see the light about her rottten daughter. She actually looks forward to summer as well, probably because she gets a break from her indulgent parenting, which is pretty exhuasting.

Anyway, during the summer, SD17's perfect bio-daddy has an abatement from his child support for the whole 10 weeks of summer (the 7 weeks he gets SD17, and also the 3 weeks that DW has SD17). Perfect bio-daddy has a history of "dumping" SD17 early, and getting her late. For instance, if he is supposed to get her on the Friday that school lets out, he will find an excuse to postpone getting her until Sunday or Monday. At the end of the summer, he always sends her home early. He also has SD17 call DW at different points during the summer, and having her tell DW that she (SD17) wants to come home for a while. Of course, perfect bio-daddy is all too happy to give up SD during these times. Why? Because he is already relieved of child-support, and if he dumps her off, he doesn't have to pay to take care of her!

For this upcoming summer, I have encouraged DW to tell bio-daddy that she will be "unavailable" during any time when he tries to dump SD17, even if she will be home. However, DW doesn't want to lie to bio-daddy, because that is dishonest. Yes, maybe it is on some level, but you can't play by the rules when it comes to assholes like him. He is as dishonest, mean-spirited, and manipulative as they come, and he will take advantage of someone playing fairly with him. In fact, he has done this to my DW for the last 4 summers, with the aforementioned dumping. Nonetheless, DW will not lie to him, or even stretch the truth. In the end, she agreed to tell bio-daddy that she will be unavailable if I will actually make plans that will take us out of town during the time that bio-daddy wants to dump SD17. However, if I don't make plans to go out of town, she won't lie to him about being unavailable.

What does the board think about this. Is it reasonable to ask DW to lie to bio-daddy about being unavailable, so as to force him to actually take his visitation? Or should she take the "higher ground," tell the truth, and have SD17 dumped on her during a time when she is not receiving child support?