Ever Feel Like Your DH/BF Just Doesn't Get It?
I love my DH to death - but he is totally clueless as to how his daughter does him.
She lies better than any politician I've ever known and can be so straightfaced about it that it's unreal.
The problem is I KNOW he knows it..I know it!! And he just goes right along with her on most anything..and this woman is 19 years old and pregnant!
He honestly feels if he confronts her on her lying that he doesn't love her..I feel the opposite. If you love your child, you do NOT enable them to be so easily allowed to lie like they're are in kindergarten again on the playground.
This is real life..she is an adult. She has made some absolutely HORRIBLE choices...and all I hear is that it's her mother's fault. I know her mom is the lunatic from hell but a 19 year old woman is capable of making her own choices which she has for quite some time. It's not always the BM's fault you know?
Why are some of these men not capable of seeing their children for the lying, attention getting, deceivers that some of them are?
Just so tired of her dramas...
He's actually said that..he's
He's actually said that..he's learned to live with her. The way she is. Told me that I'll never be able to change her. Not that I feel I try..I just am so tired of the drama and am not afraid to say it.
I think he takes my amazement as me thinking I can somehow "heal" her..not hardly. I just see her as a large child that never grew up fully due to being coddled all her life.
The other day while she was here....I got off work and she was here outside with my DH getting ready to play cornhole. I had not seen my DH all day so I went up to him to say hello and hug him. She was about 40 feet behind us and I instantly heard her begin to yell "Daddy!" about 10 times. Then made comments on how she came 45 miles to visit him and he ignores her like this...I was hugging my DH as she was saying this mind you. When he ignored her completely she stormed back into our house..nothing like watching a pregnant 19 year old woman stomping back inside a house after being ignored by Daddy because he wouldn't stop talking to his wife who just got home.
When this baby comes I honestly don't know what she will do. How does a child like this take care of another child??
Hell if it ain't the BM their
Hell if it ain't the BM their bending for, it's the child. Tisk Tisk!
wow my husband did this too.
wow my husband did this too. Is there a book on how to be a crappy parent these men are reading?
Sometimes they really really
Sometimes they really really do not get it.
Text book cases:
1.)At the time SD16 ask DH if she could go camping for a week with friends ages 18-21.. he said no. He didn't think she had the emotional maturity to face adult peer-pressure. BM Let her go. She comes home from trip says she ill, we talk, she hugs me.... I tell DH I smell a rat, she never hugs me. She must have gotten into some trouble that we knew she might, and why we said no to the trip. He and I fight because I do not give her credit. Two days later we find out that she got a drinking ticket while camping.
2.)SS 19 says he took the ACT test and needs $45.00 reimbursement. I said to DH.. Hmm I do not think he actually took the test.. blah blah no credit due.. I said if he taken the test he would have gone on and on about what was easy and what was difficult--human nature 101 particularly when facing fears.. and this was one them. Yep, he didn't not take the test.
3.) SD18 didn't go on our ski trip this year. I bought all of her favorite foods and spent $150.00. Did a walk through with her to show her where it was. We get home she has grocery bill for $90.00 that she wants reimbursed. DH pulls out the wallet.. I say no way.. she didn't even eat the food I bought.. her choice to spend. He agrees.. (then she takes a grocery bag and starts loading up the food I originally bought to take to her mother's for the week. I interrupt her and ask if she needs any toilet paper... ) I say to DH, watch over the next few days/weeks she is going to ask for $10 here and $20 there. Sure enough. Except it wasn't $10 or $20, and it didn't take weeks--it was exactly $40 and $50.
4.) When ever the kids need money they start the convo with Daaad (SS)and Daaaadeeee (SD.
5.) Whenever they are lying or getting called to the carpet they change the subject and deflect... and start with DH or BM bashing trying to make him feel guilty. He let's them and they never get back to the original topic.
No one has spent more time analyzing my SKIDS. I can now say, and even DH will agree, I know them better than he.
You cannot change them. You can call them out for their behaviors.