BM withholding medical ID cards
The skids are covered under BM's insurance .. their military ID cards serve as their insurance IDs as well.
BM left these for DH in the mailbox about a month ago (separate story .. but her way of trying to drop by the house unannounced to see the skids). The mailman took them and had them destroyed (Post Office policy) and has since had to get new ones issued.
She is now refusing to give DH the new cards because he is trying to schedule a doctor appointment for their annual physicals. DH and BM agreed on the new doctor 2 months ago. Both skids need physicals before starting school in the fall, and SD7 is out of her inhaler medication.
BM doesn't think DH should be the one scheduling the appointments or taking them to the doctor, so she's refusing to provide the cards (required for the first appointment with the new doc).
And so it begins .. again ..
She couldn't be this way when
She couldn't be this way when she was with DH .. she was deployed the majority of the time.
We're taking the skids on vacation to the beach next week .. she HAS to provide those cards. DH needs them in the event of an emergency.
So we'll see .. it's sort of entertaining to see her make herself look so ridiculous over such simple issues. But still a headache ..
They have not been to this
They have not been to this doctor yet; they just relocated back to the area and selected a new one. DH tried to call and schedule the appointment and they need info that's listed on the card before they'll even book the appointment.
He can try .. but I don't
He can try .. but I don't expect that they'd give him that info.
That's also DH's exact point .. we're taking the skids out of town on vacation in a week .. what if there's an emergency? He'll need the cards then.
All you need is the sponsor's
All you need is the sponsor's SSN. You are good to go. Don't worry about the actual cards.
That's what DH thought .. but
That's what DH thought .. but when he called the doctor's office, they asked for the PO Box mailing address and plan number. They told him the info is found on the card, and they can't book the appointment without it.
Tricare won't give him any info because he's not a member and not covered by her insurance.
You can get the billing
You can get the billing address off the website- you just have to know if they are north, south, west or whatever. And the plan number is the sponser's SSN. My ex is military and my kids are carried by tricare, and I have never needed their card.
Even if the doctor is not on
Even if the doctor is not on a military base? This doctor is not a military doctor .. and they're asking specifically for the medical insurance card. DH knows what they're talking about .. but I don't know how he'll get around providing it?
Nope, my kids have never gone
Nope, my kids have never gone on base. Even when I was married to my ex. Tell them there is no card. They are military. As long as they accept tricare they should know that.
*sigh* He tried. They're
*sigh*
He tried. They're refusing to schedule an apopintment without the info.
Looks like this will be a fun office to deal with :/
Dude, call another doctor.
Dude, call another doctor.
He can't .. this is the
He can't .. this is the doctor they "agreed" on. With joint decisions being 50/50, he can't just pick a new one without her consent.
This is the reason why I will
This is the reason why I will let 50/50 be over my dead body. Such crap.
Agreed. It's just BM making
Agreed. It's just BM making the decisions while DH fights to have some sort of input.
The physical cards arent
The physical cards arent needed all you need is the sponsers name and date of birth from that ANY provider can go online to Tricares website and prove coverage.
Honestly I would have your attny email BMs attny that you want COPIES of the ID cards sent to your attorney. The copies (front and back) can be scanned/ xerox'd just as easily as the real thing at doctors offices.
She's claiming she doesn't
She's claiming she doesn't have them now. She's waiting for them to be mailed.
Anyone else smell BS?
Yup .. and by the time that
Yup .. and by the time that happens, school will have started, BM will have scheduled her own appointment when SHE wants to (probably giving DH 1 day's notice).
And before it goes to court, but AFTER DH spends all the money on the attorney, BM will voluntarily hand over the cards.
Wow....just wow. She is
Wow....just wow. She is willing to fight about providing insurance cards??
It does concern me that SD7 is out of her inhaler medication, she needs that, especially bc BM smokes around them. Doesn't BM realize that in a trigger for SD7?
I feel for you!!!
She's out of the medication
She's out of the medication at our house .. but SD5 is on the same inhaler, so they've been sharing it. DH has contacted her last pulmonologist and had them call in a new prescription.
I'm sure SD7 has an inhaler at BM's house, but she's only there every other weekend in the summer.
Glad your DH called the
Glad your DH called the pulmonologist and got a new prescription!
BM is setting your household up to fail. Meds are important and she should be doing whatever she needs to make that happen at all households FOR her girls.
BM in our situation allows SS10 to pack his own meds, never checks to make sure all of it is current and there is anything in the inhalers and nasal sprays. We have insisted on dual prescriptions for both households as BM is flakey about making sure it's packed. You'd think with an ongoing CPS investigation for medical neglect that BM would be on top of meds, etc. Sadly, not. Her newest ploy is that she sent a picture of a stash of pills that SS10 supposedly did not take prior to almost dying from an asthma attack, blaming SS10 for the whole CPS involvement. SMDH....SS10 is to blame, not BM!
DH has called the old doctor
DH has called the old doctor to get a refill called in .. that's not the primarcy concern right now.
The girls need physicals for school .. and we're going out of town for vacation.
DH has considered just adding his kids to his own insurance plan. Doing ANYTHING doctor related with BM is a headache and a half .. because she knows she can control the information flow.
Are the kids on Tricare
Are the kids on Tricare Standard (Insurance through the military where you pay a deductible and a co insurance amount) Or are they on Tricare Prime (where you pay Co-Pays and have to pay a monthly premium for the insurance?)
Tricare Standard does NOT have an insurance card. Providers (doctors, hospitals, laboratories etc etc etc) make a copy of the covered persons Military ID card. (For the girls the cards would be orange background with a picture of the girls on the cards).
Military ID cards are NEVER mailed -- and of note these are the cards that state "If found please drop in nearest post office drop box: postmaster please return card to Department of Defense at blah blah blah address) This card will NEVER have a claims mailing address on it.
If the kids have Tricare Prime: THEN they have an actual INSURANCE card. It is white and says TRICARE at the top. It is POSSIBLE that these are being mailed... but I cannot see the postman destroying an insurance card. This is a card that would have a claims mailing address on it.
Tell the doctor to go to www.mytricare.com enter the girls info and just freaking PRINT the benefits and eligibility out and call it a day.
Heck PM me the information
Heck PM me the information and I will print it and email it to you. I have access.
Seriously?! I tried to log in
Seriously?!
I tried to log in but it's telling me to register an account or something.
I work for a medical provider
I work for a medical provider muhahaha I have the god powers over tricare LOL
I love evil laughter in the
I love evil laughter in the morning.
Thank you for bringing up Tricare. I was just getting ready to mention it.
I used to work for a family practice with a lot of Coast Guard families. I was the medical biller/insurance/referral person.
When DH called, they told him
When DH called, they told him the girls weren't "enrolled" at that office. Do you know what that means?
Why is tricare so difficult .. my insurance company is so much easier to manage ..
Tricare won't talk to him at
Tricare won't talk to him at all because he isn't a member.
Here is the number to Tricare
Here is the number to Tricare North
North •Health Net Federal Services
•1-877-TRICARE (1-877-874-2273)
Have DH call. He may need to fax in a copy of the divorce decree showing joint. And he can set up his own login and password for the girls... that way you guys can track all claims etc. And you will know if BM takes them to doctors without telling you.
As a PS he also needs to set this up with Delta Dental or whatever dental provider the kids go through
Thank you! I will pass this
Thank you! I will pass this info along to him.
The skids are covered under his own dental insurance. BM doesn't take them to the dentist (ever) and the cost to carry them on his plan is minimal.
District Sales rep for a
District Sales rep for a large and rapidly growing medical supply and orthotics company.
We're still almost a month
We're still almost a month away from school starting, so it's not really urgent. BM has registered them at the school they'll be attending near her .. I have no idea why she would refuse to let DH take them for a physical. Just a control/power trip ..
Thank you! This site really
Thank you! This site really is a breath of fresh air! DH and I can discuss and vent all of our frustrations amongst ourselves, but this site really gives me the advice/guidance I need to move on to the next step. I'm not a dweller/moper by nature .. I get mad/angry/upset, and want to take action!
He's going to look into the cost of carrying his own insurance for the girls. The added difficulty will be making sure the doctors they see accept both forms of coverage.
If there were more time, he
If there were more time, he could potentially strike out on his own. He has to inform of all appointments and contact info though. Once receiving that info, she would call and cancel the appointments (exactly what she did last year) because she doesn't agree to the new doctor.
The trouble is that he apparently can't make doc appointments without her insurance card (trying to clarify this with tricare now). The girls aren't covered under his plan yet, and that can't be changed overnight either.
DH knows I come here and even scopes it out himself sometimes. Definitely a TON of useful info here
Update: So she started off
Update:
So she started off claiming she didn't have the cards. DH couldn't make an appointment without them. She swore she'd give them to him as soon as she got them.
She dropped the skids off Sunday and handed the cards she supposedly didn't have to DH. DH called the doctor office this morning at 9:30am to schedule appointments .. come to find out BM scheduled them already on Friday evening. They are (of course) during her time 3 days before school starts.
She sent an email at 11:30 today saying she called this morning and scheduled them .. after DH clearly told her that he was going to take them once he got the insurance info. So .. she essentially lied twice.
At the end of the day .. at least the kids are getting their physicals .. :?