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Anyone else even CLOSE to living like this???

CalliMay09's picture

SS13 is the most spoiled Coddled disrespectful rude brat ever. BM is a total Helicopter parent who every move is for SS13. DH is a spineless broken down coward who would rather have SS13 burn down the house than Discipline the brat in fear SS13 would disown him. 
 

SS13 has hit both DH and I DH more than once. Swore at both of us screaming. Thrown  everything from DH cell phone to rocks when pissed. Has on more than one occasion "ran off" pissed when he did not get his way. Once when we were out of state up on a mountain hiking. All this has happened in the last 4 years. Now NOT once was SS13 punished for any of this from DH. DH reason is because BM lets SS13 run wild with no rules/Consequences it makes it impossible for DH to Punish SS13. I call total BS on this. Yes the part about BM is true BUT the reason DH won't Punish SS13 is DH knows SS13 will flip the holy hell out and probably refuse to come over. BM would love that(so would I)

So most negitive behavior DH  ignores especially if I don't say anything. Things that DH can't ignore like schoolwork DH bribes SS13 with gifts/money. Funny DH is all involved in SS13 schooling wanting to make sure he gets good grades to get into a good college BUT does not care that SS13 has full blown temper tantrum's and swears at us. 
 

So it comes down to DH ignoring the bad behavior or if DH finds it "important" DH will then go the bribery route   But never ever any kind of Punishment or consequences for anything. 

ndc's picture

Did I just read that this brat SS has HIT YOU??  More than once?  And he swears at you? And your cowardly husband did nothing about it?

What in the world do you see in him?  He can't ignore schoolwork but he can ignore his brat hitting and swearing at his wife??  The world has gone nuts.

shellpell's picture

No, Not even close. Hitting you?? If SS so much as threatened me, DH would see him outside the house and discipline appropriately. HIT YOU? Read that. Your "D" H is letting his child HIT YOU.

Survivingstephell's picture

Nope. Once violence enters the picture everything must change. The authorities should have been called by YOU to get a paper trail started minimum. Because it was allowed to happen with no consequences, the little criminal now thinks it's ok to do that. My DH was a corrections officer for 30+ years.  This kid needs to have consequences NOW before he attacks the wrong person and goes to prison.  His father is doing society no favor in sending into the world another male  that hits women.   If there is a next time that you suffer any damage from SS (violence, theft, etc)  call the cops. You give him consequences. DH might balk but he should be ashamed of himself for not backing up his wife.   

Survivingstephell's picture

Nope. Once violence enters the picture everything must change. The authorities should have been called by YOU to get a paper trail started minimum. Because it was allowed to happen with no consequences, the little criminal now thinks it's ok to do that. My DH was a corrections officer for 30+ years.  This kid needs to have consequences NOW before he attacks the wrong person and goes to prison.  His father is doing society no favor in sending into the world another male  that hits women.   If there is a next time that you suffer any damage from SS (violence, theft, etc)  call the cops. You give him consequences. DH might balk but he should be ashamed of himself for not backing up his wife.   

CalliMay09's picture

It was a disaster...for DH. Older SS was caught STEALING and refused to talk to DH about and started swearing at  DH and I. DH called the cops just to scare Older SS but BM rushed over to "rescue" the little delinquent before the cops could come. Calling the cops got DH a Restraining order, visit from CPS and BLASTED in family court by the judge on how "despicable" it was for DH to call the police to "scare" his "poor teenager son". Yep believe it or not. This being said I don't see DH EVER calling the police against younger SS13 no mater what he does. Said world we live in

Rumplestiltskin's picture

You should call the cops if he ever hits you again. At 13, it is getting to the point where your life is in danger if he gets violent. Your DH must have admitted that he called them just to "scare" SS. That sounds like a cop-out, like your DH did it then felt guilty so he put the blame on himself, acting like he didn't really want anything done. A juvenile delinquent boot camp might be the only thing that can get him under control at this point. He will end up incarcerated eventually if he stays on this path, and you or your DH, or even BM might end up seriously injured or dead as this little sh!t-head gets stronger and bigger. 

CalliMay09's picture

So don't think SS13 would do anything to me as I stay clear of him now. Since both BM and DH bend over backwards and never punish SS13 for anything doubt full SS13 would ever go full Psycho on them. Now other people and kids are where I see the issue going to happen. It's just a matter of time before some kid really pisses SS13 off and SS13 flips a nut bad. I doubt other people will be so forgiving as BM/DH. Secretly I'm hoping for that day then SS13 will be sent off to some mental hospital or jail if older and I'll be rid of him and there will be nothing DH can do then

nappisan's picture

keep your toothbrush hidden thats all i can say !! these little brats will go to extremes to taunt you.  Personally i would hit him back,,but get a good one in as it would be your one and only chance to do so, then you can tell DH & BM you were defending yourself against his violent outburst.    

tog redux's picture

I do not live like this, and would not live like this.

BM let SS21 do whatever he wanted at her house when he was younger, and DH disciplined him.  Yep, he stopped coming over or speaking to DH at age 15, but he came back around eventually.

I couldn't be married to a man who was such a coward.

Rags's picture

Nothing lighting that kid's bare butt up with a paddle or a belt won't fix.  

What is missing in this situation is a father with some testicular fortitude.

I would not live like this because I would not be married to a ball-less coward if I were you. Fortunately, my wife has more than enough parental testicular fortitude to have not allowed this pathetic level of parental failure to occur in our marriage. And even if she had not prevented this kind of crap from happening, I would have.

Light his violent ill behaved ass up.

smh

Before anyone starts with the "that is not legal in my State" crap.... read your State's actual laws on corporal punishment.  Only in the State is Delaware is corporal punishment applied by anyone acting en loco parentis illegal.  Each State's laws and applicaiton of those laws can differ.

Look up your State here for a start. Or... call your lawyer.

https://kidjacked.com/legal/spanking_law.asp

Is It Legal to Spank Your Kids? | ParentMap