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Which is worse????

zerostepdrama's picture

Thinking about my SDs.

I was talking about them to a friend of mine, I hadn't talked to in awhile and she wanted an update on the step situation.

So I was going into it and I was explaining about YSD15 and MSD18.

I described it as this:

YSD15 just doesnt give a fuck. She doesnt care if I know she doesnt like me. She walks around like her shit don't stink and she doesn't care who knows it. Take it or leave it. She isn't going to kiss anyone's ass. If you dont like her, well she has no use for you. Which in a way I kind of "like". She isn't fake. She isn't trying to play games. In some ways though she comes across as very cold hearted.

Then there is MSD18. She will manipulate the hell out of you. She will act like you are her best friend, all the while she is telling BM, lie after lie and she is stealing your jewerly from your bedroom. She will smile in your face, but stab you in the back. But she can show a level of kindness which may be real. Or it may be so she can manipulate your trust and then just to screw you over again. She sometimes can be humble and accept things as they are.

They are who they are and that is fine. I'm sure they have things to say about me.

But man, they are so different. I dont know which one is worse. LOL.

Comments

katielee's picture

SD12 sounds like your MSD18. I prefer YSD15. At least you don't have to pretend with that one.

hereiam's picture

In the step situation, I think the important thing is that you know what you are dealing with with each one.

As far as human beings, if YSD15 really does have a cold heart, she may never grow as a person or have real feelings. If she doesn't learn to at least fake it when appropriate, she is going to have a really hard time in the world.

MSD18 could grow up to be a decent adult if she is capable of kindness and humility now. She just has to mature and realize that that is the better path, but at least she has something to work with.

zerostepdrama's picture

Ugh agree with what you said about MSD18. THIS is why I have given her so many chances then she just screws me over again. I have seen some kindness in her. But then I get confused and can't tell if it's true or if it's something she is doing so she can get something in return.

zerostepdrama's picture

Not sure if that is how I percieve them. Even though DH's family and friends have seen similar behavior and mentioned it, without any prompting from me.

Maybe its just how they are with people they dont like???

misSTEP's picture

I'd rather deal with someone who would spit in my face than someone who smiles at me and then stabs me in the back...

misSTEP's picture

I'd rather deal with someone who would spit in my face than someone who smiles at me and then stabs me in the back...