Nope, you are not responsible. You don't "need" to do anything.

No - Repeat after me: Not my kid, not my problem. What you do is only what you want to do. Also, you need to check and see if their CO has a ROFR in their. If so, the BM has to be notified if he is not there to watch them. We did if it was over 4 hours.

Only do what you want. This is not your kid. Read the disengaging essays, it will help.

No. Just no.

She will bitch MORE that YOU are 'babysitting' her son.

Your DH is silly. He needs a modified custody agreement to reflect his work schedule. Not your problem.

Not your problem. He needs to man up and deal with his ex.

Of course, you are NOT responsible for keeping his son while he is away working.

Not only is it not your responsibility, it is not a good idea for liability reasons.

Don't do it! That also means do not give in, no matter how much he (DH) or she (BM) whines, gets mad or complains. It will only set a precedence of you being a built in babysitter in the future if you give in once. Especially based on your history with the kid?!? You're only opening up a whole big ass can of worms if you start this.

Like others have said, not your kid, not your problem.

I personally don't care what my ssons told their mother about me. First of all, prove it. Second of all, who knows how this 'incident' was reported. Was BM digging for info and SS told her something to get her to leave him alone?"

Tell him that it is not your job to take care of his son when he is away for more than a few hours. And it is his ex's right to decide if she wants you watching her son (because you know full well she doesn't want you taking care of her son). If she was going away for a few weeks even for work would he want his ex's husband/partner taking care of his son when he could?

Have you told him that....One, you do not want to put yourself in the position for the kid to lie on you again. Two, you won't have your son during that time, so you are not going to babysit anyone elses kid? And three, there is no reason for SS to be there for that long if DH is not there.

I don't babysit, ever. Nope. Not having it. Not my kid, not my problem. In fact, SO has to work Thursday and Friday night, after his regular day job. I'll be home Thursday night all night and the SD9 will be with a babysitter elsewhere. Friday I'll be out of town, so it's of no matter. I didn't even offer Thursday night up. Tough shit, SO. Deal with it.

The visitation is specifically so he can spend time with his father. If Dad is not going to be there, what is the point in picking him up and making you responsible for him for two entire weeks?

The answer is no. Plain and simple. It's not your responsibility to care for his child while he is gone. It's up to his PARENTS to deal with it. If they were still married, BM would be caring for him anyway.

Have him show you the paperwork stating that if BF is not available then SM is required to babysit for free. No way, no how.

Same thing happened to me. I was told I had to watch her while he was gone. I got guilted into it - one of my biggest regrets in life was given in to the guilt placed on me then.

So much trouble came my way for watching THIER child.

Do not do it!!!!!!!

Just say no!

^^^^^^^^^^^ what she said^^^^^^^

Blended families are not the same. If there is a BM causing issues - the normal way of running a house and raising kids change. I was told all the same stuff - and I tell you I REGRET getting guilted into it.

That is why my signatures says - Step Parenting: it's just like parenting without any of the credit and all of the blame.

Tell him nope - not at this stage with your BM - NOPE.

I would guilt trip your husband back, I've used it as an effective argument tool. Your SS deserves and should be with one of his parents and it is unfair on him to be stuck with you (not his parent) whilst his dad is away. He should be with his mother. If his mother can't look after him then he should go to another relative (grandparent/aunt) who is willing to or....your husband should get a job that doesn't require weeks away from home when he has responsibilities to look after a child.

I always try to look at a situation to see if my involvement is really helping out my husband (and I will willingly help him out with reasonable requests) or if it is more helping out BM (who I owe absolutely nothing to and have no desire to help). Looking after a child for a month is not a reasonable request and the child should be with BM, if she is unwilling to take her child then you would be doing BM a favor, and frankly you don't owe her anything and why should you. And if she is willing to take her child but your husband is too stubborn to let her take him then is that really beneficial to the child, who should really be with one of his parents?

Everything you just said is what I was told. The exact same thing!

And what I learned from falling into that bear trap is this - it makes you and step kids have a harded time bonding. They feel weird they are not with a parent, do not what you telling them what to do, will complain about you to BM how is around and she will just give you shit.

Yes - watch my child but I am going to give you shit in how you do it. NOPE - don't due.

Don't do it for you and your step child. You both have the right to slowly bond. Not the bullshit guilt the father gives then the - you suck from the BM -

The losers in this situation are you and the step child.

I am going through this right now. Fiance told bm that he would take SS5 one week off and one week on for the summer without even consulting me. He works full time and i work part time plus take on 100% of the domestic duties at home. My mother watches my girls whenever i have to work. He automatically signed me up to babysit SS5 while he is at work and assumed my mom wld have to take care of him while I work too. Fiance works 6 am to 6pm sometimes as late as 8pm.....I pitched a fit and told him he had no right to pick him up and assume I or my mom were responsible for watching him. Since then, I have been public enemy number 1. My name is "thenwhatareu" because thats all i have been hearing from my fiance after telling him I would not watch his son while he goes off to work. He states, "how is this a family, if I cant count on your help? Then what are you? Your not being a team player, Your supposed to be like his mom." But I am not his mom! SS5 adores his mom and wld rather be with his mom or moms side of the fam then with me. I have my own bio kids to take care of, a 3 year old (together) and a 13 year old that drive me nuts half the day....I dont need to throw another one in to the mix , that spends their entire time with me, whining, asking about where his dad is or telling me he wants to be home with his mom or grandma. I got out of babysitting for the week long periods of time. Fiance told bm he would only be able to pick up son when he was off from work.However last night my fiance picked up his son knowing he agreed to work for a few hours this morning and guilt tripped me into watching him while he goes off to work. That in itself is not an issue with me , the issue with me this morning is that , I had plans to take my 13 year old daughter and her cousin on a day trip to the water park and he knew it. Yet he still picked up his son and made plans to work. He knew our plans for a week and he knew it would delay me from going on our planned trip with my bio daughter. We are still going , but much later in the day now. He wants me to be 100% mother to all three kids. We have one 3 year old daughter together, I have a 13 year old and he has his 5 year old. My 13 year old doesnt want to do things that the 3 and 5 year old want to do. I dont blame her,shes 13 so Im trying to do stuff with her that she enjoys and fiance thinks she shld suck it up and have us all do things together as a family . 3 and 5 year old cant even sit through a movie...so that leaves us going to the park, circus, zoo ...typical toddler activities....my 13 year old of course is bored out of her mind the entire time rolling her eyes. I'm torn , anytime I want to do things with my 13 year old, "im a monster who is dividing the family". I dont dislike ss5, I just dont want to have 100% responsibility of him when he is in our home, especially when bm has made it clear that I am not his mom and have no say in his life. SS5 comes over to visit with his dad not me. Im okay with doing a few family activities on the weekends we have him but I dont want to spend 72 hours straight with him, it drives me bonkers..too much crying and whining...my bio kids are more independent. Its like BM's work load decreases when hes gone and mine increases when we have him because my fiance doesnt step up (until now because I basically checked out) so he doesnt have a choice. BM is rasing ss5 one way, I raise my daughters a different way and thats okay. Anything I teach ss5 goes in one ear and out the other, I just end up frustrated and take it out on my girls. Im tired of living that way so I said no more and now I am a horrible step mom
(ahhh so sorry for the rant)

ABSOLUTELY NO.

If you do choose to do this...be sure to get a Power of Attorney signed by both parents. Ensure you have insurance cards, emergency money, etc.

Again - I say absolutely no. It turns my stomach that I know you're considering this.

I told DH that he needs to treat this as if he were a single parent and he's lucky enough to have me here in case of emergencies. I tell DH to do what every other single mother does and find before/after school care and/or a full time summer camp program for SD.

I'm not his and BM's free nanny.