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SD18 called and DH wants to give her pass

TickedOff's picture

Submitted by TickedOff on Thu, 02/20/2014 - 8:06am

SD18 called she's back in town. She says she had a hard time in California and had her aunt pay for her plane ticket back because she was too scared to call DH. DH ate it all up hearing his daughter sobbing on the phone and saying how sorry she was for stealing from and that she knows she has a problem. She promised to pay us back with interest. DH said if she can't find a job she can work for him. At first I was so pissed so pissed. Heck I still have some steam settling. I about lost my voice fighting with DH over the whole thing. But in the end I thought about DD if it was her I would be pissed but still want to help her because she's my daughter and I love her.

DH wants me to drop the charges and let her sign a written agreement to pay us back. I don't know. It’s going to take so much for me to ever trust her again. I have even changed the locks to my house because of her. But I do care about her and I don't want her ending up like her mom. I wish we could make her spend a few nights in prison with BM so she sees that we are serious and can hear from her mom and see for herself that that is not where she wants to end up. I just don't know what my heart and mind is thinking yet it’s all jumbled.

Comments

omgsaveme's picture

Submitted by omgsaveme on Thu, 02/20/2014 - 8:31am

I would definitely lay out the ground rules with her. I think you are great for realizing his feelings, but I would also keep in mind that dads can be so blind to their own children. Hopefully she does change her ways and straightens up. I wouldn't give her the time to find a job either, I would have DH have her start working with him immediately so she can't use that as an excuse.

furkidsforme's picture

Submitted by furkidsforme on Thu, 02/20/2014 - 9:08am

I would keep the charges, likely if it is her first offense she will get probation anyhow.

kathc's picture

Submitted by kathc on Thu, 02/20/2014 - 9:25am

Don't drop the charges. She's a manipulative brat. Once they're dropped she'll forget all about her tearful promises to re-pay you. Her signing a piece of paper saying, "I'm sorry and I'll pay you back" will mean absolutely nothing if you have to try taking her to court later.

DarkStar's picture

Submitted by DarkStar on Thu, 02/20/2014 - 11:45am

Absolutely do not drop the charges.

If your SD is doing drugs (and it sounds like she is) then she will lie, lie, lie and then lie some more.....then steal more of your stuff.

And your DH was HOME while she was stealing everything, right? And had his nose too buried in the TV to be bothered to monitor his thieving daughter? Aw, HELL to the NO!!!!