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every time i give bm the benefit of the doubt that she cant possibly be that stupid, she has to prove me wrong!

smnikki's picture

ok
example one:
dh gets papers that bm is seeking full custody with right of refusal of dh's visitation if i would be watching ss4. She actually is so stupid as to have her first couple sentences in her statement read, "every thing was fine with custody arrangement, but respondent remarried" then in seeking more cs, actually states that she needs more money from my dh because she fears her disability is running out. ummmmmmmmmm helllllllllloooooooo, GET A JOB!!

so i was stressing, thinking she cant possibly be so stupid as to think this crap is going to get her full custody when dh has had 50/50 all of ss's life. i was thinking, she must think she has something that is bad (a lie obviously since dh and i do everything by the book!) but i was going crazy trying to figure out what story she had made up for court! Then she proves me wrong! she really IS that stupid! shows up with NOTHING! not even a single sheet of paper and rambles about the stupid crap she put in her statement, that we had all kinds of evidence to show she was a freaking liar!

example two!
last week she tells dh that she is trying to look for a pre school for ss. because she knows she broke a court order by removing ss from daycare with out consent from my dh. this week, dh asks her what places has she looked at because Tuesday on his day off he is going to go look. what do you know she only has been to one! and already has him on the waiting list with out approval from dh. so dh calls and says, take him off the list, i have not approved! smnikki will compile a list of 10 local places, we will both (dh and bm) on their own visit the places and decide which one they want ss to go to, and then meet to decide..............so ive been calling, getting info, blah blah blah

come to find out....ss is out of daycare because the state asst program cut her off because she wasnt looking for a job and free loading! the place where she told dh she had him on the waiting list is a preK, for ONLY low income families. and only provides care for half day which since dh and i have jobs this clearly wont work. but because bm has no money she qualifies for free care there! once again bm is working the system! how can she possibly think that only half day care was going to fly? she just really is that freaking stupid!

also, just because she refuses to get her lazy azz up and get a job to pay for care for ss it infuriates me that she is so okay with putting ss in govt programs and care facilities that are only "low income" she might be nothing more than poor white trash but dh and i work hard to provide a good life for our family and that includes ss, i just dont get how a mother can be so quick to lower the quality of life her child has...ugh, she is just so freaking stupid!

Comments

LizzieA's picture

Smnikki, keep up the good work, hold your head up high, and it will all come out in your favor. Just wait and see.

Stick's picture

SMNikki - Doctor's Orders!!

1. Grab your sweet DH and some ALCOHOL and have a few nice LIBATIONS!

2. Nookie Nookie

(Don't you feel better now?)

3. Try to remember that BM is trying to work the system, but the mediator already saw through that.

Can I ask... would you and DH ever consider full custody? I know you would like to have a child, so they could grow together. And clearly, your home is a better environment and more stable that BM's. Then ss's "education" (I know it's pre-school, but I believe they do some "activities") would not be compromised by BM's unwillingness to change her lifestyle for her son.

Best wishes and LOTS OF HUGS being sent your way. Stay strong!

*** A rainbow just threw up on me... and now I'm sh*tting glitter! ***

DISbelief's picture

Oh sounds so familiar, especially the daycare stuff, and her disability running out. LOL. Been here!!

DISbelief~

~You have to BE crazy to UNDERSTAND crazy!~ ; )

smnikki's picture

we would gladly take full custody! we truly want whats best for ss, and if that means having him full time so be it! however as the mediator stated, it will be close to impossible for either parent to change the current 50/50 custody. Bm posted on her myspace today that "shes heartbroken, lost the only true love of her life" im assuming bf finally got sick and tired of her lazy butt and kicked her growing fat azz to the curb. court is the 26th and we shall see how well bm keep it together. according to the govt asst office she may or may not have committed fraud, but for sure broke a court order. she is already being ordered to attend counseling for her issues!

the judge is who REALLY decides! i will be by dh's side for court, and im hoping that dh and i being a united front to all her harassment will cause her to lose it and flip out in front of the judge. I pray that the judge will see just how emotionally, financially, and everything else UNSTABLE!!! we think the judge may just give us temporary full custody till she gets it together, but we wont know till the 26th......also, bm has no job, (possibly) no bf, will have to find a place to live, find a job, she cant have more kids, and if we got full custody i can see her just stepping over the edge and really going nuts, and i dont think ss would even recover from having a bm who has flew the coop! so we shall see!

number 1 and 2.....we will be handeling that tonight for sure!! lol

big hugs to you too!! have a great weekend!!!

misfit's picture

WOwow you've had so much going on and you seem to be handling it very well. What strikes me "stupid" in particular is BM's myspace post. Losing the love of her life? You said she means bf? Or SS? Either way, it sounds ridiculous and I just love that posting something like that for the world to see is obviously just directed at you for a pity shot. Maybe I'm biased because I no longer use networking sites but it sounds hilarious. What a sad woman.

Thank God the judge sees through her idiot motives!! I've read so many stories on here saying that judges often feel so bad for BMs and "overlook" their irrational behavior, falling for excuses that are simply lies.

Also, it's really big of you to say you'd take SS full time. That might sound ridiculous to many of you since that's what you sign up for when marrying a man with kids, the possibility of having them full time. But I'm not married to my SO and we don't have SS even 50/50, so when I try to put myself in your shoes, it would be a really hard decision for me to allow SS to live with us full time. Kudos to you. You sound like a really emotionally responsible and loving stepmama Smile

If you wish to give off light, you must endure the burning.

smnikki's picture

bm cheated on my dh before they seperated, and that guy has been her bf ever since. when dh and i moved in together, bm pushed her bf to move in with her, and then got fired and didnt get another job so that if things got bad she knew bf wouldnt kick her out on the streets. the love of her life is about her bf. she cried in mediation about how bf has told her he will never marry her, etc and since she cant have kids she cant try to trap him like she did my dh.

she then put..want to crawl in a whole i wish i had son this weekend i miss him, im lonely

now this worries me because i can see that she is going through alot....but how healthy is it for her to use ss as her emotional crutch? i have a feeling she is going to baby him to the point that it will hinder his development.

now it says...she trying to come to terms with things, and is having a hard time but is getting motivated, miss son, cant wait to see him tomorrow

but she hasnt changed any pictures on her page, is still "in a relationship" and about her says she loves spending time with her sweetheart bf?!

who freaking knows, she is a nut job, i just try to prepare myself for her next shit storm

BMJen's picture

Nikki, I just hate how some of these BM's are. My sons father hardley ever sees him. If he wanted to be a part of his life I would do anything I could to help. I would stay out of stuff, unless I had to step in for my son's saftey! Other than that I would keep my nose out of it. I would respect the SM. I wouldn't fuss a bit. I would be freaking ESTATIC if he had anything to do with our son. I can't stand hearing about the BM's that don't want their x's to see their kids. Hello, who are you hurting you dumb bitch.........YOUR OWN KID!!!!!!!!!

I can't believe it sometimes. I just really can't beleive it because I'd give my right arm if he would just take a interest in our son. But nope, won't do it. And all of us, me included, are here struggling because our husbands want to see their kids and the bitch is trying to stop them.......and for what?

For what?

For MONEY. That's it. MONEY. MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY. That's what these bitches see their kids as.

If just one of you were my son's step mother I'd be in heaven.

Nikki, I'm gonna pray for you and your DH, and your SS.

Wicked.Step.Monster's picture

You got that right Jen... money money money!!! It is sickening to say the least! BM here sure does want her check every month but no way in hell does she want to actually DO her job! Instead we have SDs calling here crying and begging to live with us because they are old enough to KNOW how much different and how much better their lives and opportunities would be here.... Yet we have nothing in the eyes of the court to use to try to get them...

erz1003's picture

That is sooooooooooo TRUE all these BM's only want $$$$$. They view their children as a "free meal". Why can't they just understand that the only persaon that they are hurting is the poor child. Let it go BM's form HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!