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I am sure Bm will be mad but oh well

proud mom's picture

Submitted by proud mom on Thu, 08/02/2007 - 6:00am

I am sure BM will be mad after the things I did for SD6 this week. I took all the kids shopping on Monday and BS6 amd SD6 picked out their back packs and lunch boxes for school so I went ahead and bought them. Then on Wed BS6 and 10 go to with their dad from 3:30-7:30 for a vist (they do this every Tue and Wed evening) well DH had to work late so it left just me and SD6 so I thought this would be the perfect time for the "girls" and I needed to go to the mall and have a necklace inspected for its warranty so SD6 and I went to the mall, stopped at the nail place and had a manicure, went to her favorite store Claires and bought some new hair do dads and then went to dinner at her choice of resturants Texas Roadhouse. I do things kinda like this with my boys so I thought I would take the opportunity to spend some quality time with SD6. Her little nails look so cute the shaped and trimmed them and then she picked the brightest pink polish she could find and then the lady even painted a little flower on each ring finger, white with silver glitter in the center to look like rhinstones. She was smiling ear to ear.

I am sure this will not go over well with BM. Maybe I shouldn't have taken her?? Oh well to late now. I just wanted her to feel special and loved by me not just her dad. I am sure we will get a phone call this weekend about me taking her to do anything BM hates me spending time with her, but she never does anything special with her all SD ever talks about is Aunt **** painted my nails, or Grandma **** took me here or there. As for the back pack I did ask Bm a couple of weeks ago if it was ok to pick some things up for SD for school so that shouldn't be a big deal. Oh well if she is mad she might as well get glad because being mad is not going to get her anywhere.

Comments

Anne 8102's picture

Submitted by Anne 8102 on Thu, 08/02/2007 - 7:16am

I took my SD for a haircut once and I was deathly worried about what her mother would say. She knew I was getting it cut, but I was worried she wouldn't like the style. (SD wanted her hair cut like mine!) But we went and I let SD get whatever cut she wanted and it was darling. We emailed pics to her mom and her mom loved it, too. I was shocked! This woman has NEVER wanted me anywhere near her children. Maybe your BM will have enough sense to not want to hurt her daughter's feelings and not say anything ugly. Either way, nothing good we do for our skids is wrong. We should never let anyone tell us it is.

~ Anne ~

"Love, having no geography, knows no boundaries."
(Truman Capote)

Tired2's picture

Submitted by Tired2 on Thu, 08/02/2007 - 8:52am

I want to first start by saying Good for you! I'm so glad that you were able to get some of that "special" time with your SD. Times like that are so few and far between for some of us that to hear a success story like yours is music to my ears. My SD won't let me take her to do anything....absolutely NOTHING because of her mother. BM gets very angry. For instance, I too took her for a hair cut (SD requested it) and when BM saw it all she talked about was how terrible it looked. (way to treat your child and help their self esteem huh?) I thought it looked great and so did SD until she saw her mother...I could tell she was crushed and from that moment on....5 years ago.....SD won't let me take her to get her hair done or nails or anything.....
You have no idea how great it was to hear your story....it gives me hope.

Chocoholic's picture

Submitted by Chocoholic on Thu, 08/02/2007 - 1:27pm

Who Cares? Let her be mad.... you're not doing anything wrong, in fact you're doing everything right. BM should be thankful to have such a loving, caring role model for her daughter while she is in DH's care. If BM doesn't get that then she likely never will because she is more concerned with her own selfish insecurities rather than thinking of her daughter's best interests.... Keep on doin what you're doin!

JUST ME IN NJ's picture

Submitted by JUST ME IN NJ on Thu, 08/02/2007 - 2:18pm

If she's mad that you had some bonding time w/ your SD, then it's something she just has to get over!!! Would she be happier if you completely ingnored your SD??? No, she'd be pissed about that too, so maybe she'll just surprise you & be thankful for treating her child so nicely. As long as you are being a positive, caring role model, don't you ever worry about what your SD's BM thinks. At the end of the day YOU know what you did was worth ever smile you saw on your SD's face.

What doesn't kill you, will make you stronger!

Little Jo's picture

Submitted by Little Jo on Thu, 08/02/2007 - 7:07pm

And so well is right!!!!

It's not like you took her to a sex toy shop. Congrats on your bonding moment.

Keep up the good work. Jo

"May the forces of evil get confused on the way to your house." George Carlin