Nervous about this weekend...just needing some support
BM should be served with the restraining order this weekend. I'm nervous about what's going to happen. Her nice act has been wavering and she goes back and forth from wishing me a good day to snapping at me for still not responding to her and accusing me of things. I'm worried about what's going to happen when she gets served the order. My aide at the attorney's office tried to comfort me and tell me just to take it in stride and call her on Monday to let her know everything that BM did from the moment she got served so that I can sue her.
Also, we hadn't had SS in several weeks because one was not our weekend, then the next was Mother's Day. This weekend, BM asked to switch with us because he was supposed to be going on a trip (the trip that she invited ME to go on with her and SS!). Well, apparently the trip didn't take as long as she thought it would and she suprised us by letting us know we'd be getting him this weekend instead of next. We had no idea of this until today and had to pick him up tonight. I can understand why you guys all get frustrated with BMs who are constantly changing the plans. It really cut into my weekend which was planned around the fact that SS wouldn't be here. I don't understand why we are capable of planning things to do when SS isn't going to be here, and things to do with SS for the weekends that we're actually supposed to have him; but it's impossible for her to do so. She shouldn't even think about planning a trip on a weekend that she's not going to have him. What's saying she can't just do it some other weekend? Why does it have to be on our weekend?
So anyway, I'm nervous tonight. Thanks for listening 
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Can I suggest something?
Take it easy, relax and pamper yourself. Get out and do some shopping to keep your mind off it. Take a bubble bath, sip some wine, or whatever refreshing beverage you like, snuggle up with your honey and watch a movie. Just enjoy your weekend, and not worry about BM.
If she calls, let her talk to the machine, literally, so it's all recorded, but you know that. If she emails, let her, but don't read it, just save it as you do. If you're afraid that she will come to your home and harass you, set up a video camera in a window that can tape outside your front (we had to do this for a while) and carry a tape recorder on your person if you're out... now, you won't be able to use the tape in court, but you can transcribe it better to your attorney the exact details that you 'memorized'. Just something to consider, but I would like you to relax, pamper yourself and live freely from her harassment!
I'd take you out on the town if I could!
Man has the intelligence to change his life,
Sometimes, he just fails to use it...
DH Needs to BE FIRM
He can say NO to switching weekends to accomodate BM. This cuts both ways!!! If BM doesn't want to cooperate on weekends you are requesting to be switched then don't do it. She will soon realize she is only hurting herself not bending.
Keep the child Exactly how long you are supposed to and make her bring the child back Exactly when she is supposed to. If she calls saying she needs to bring him back early tell her I am sorry but this is YOUR weekend and you need to bring him back as per the court order.
I know you are thinking about the child but you also can't give these type of BM's any kind of flexibility because all you will get in return is her trying to run your household. I have my Skids 24/7 so we have to work on our own scheduling problems ourselves.
I know you want to stay on amicable terms but she sounds manipulative and people like her know how to use nice people to control the situation. I was taught growing up that you treat people like you want to be treated. Now that I am older I know that concept works most of the time however with manipulative people you have to say no and stand your ground. DH has a restraining order so if she goes ballistic well she again is only hurting herself. He has sooo much more to work with now. If she doesn't cooperate with his weekends then DH can go back and get custody.
I like Step Moms idea about the recorders. I actually have a software that tracks incoming calls. BM in our case tries to make it seem to the children that we are keeping the kids from talking to her when she in fact doesn't call at all and we wanted to show both the courts and the kids that she is not calling. She is setting herself up to look like the victim. In your case you can use it to prove she calls and emails too much.
Thinking of you.
Nymh, Please hang in there and be strong. I know you are a nervous wreck over this. I don't blame you, I would be too. Step Mom is correct, Do not answer the phone. Do not accept contact from her period. I too wish we lived closer. At times like these, we need all the support we can get.
Hugs & best wishes. Jo
"O.K., just give me the gun and I'll shoot my-self." Burt - Soap
Weekend Updates
SS usually sleeps until about 8:30 or later on the weekend. So when we looked at his cellphone this morning, we were suprised to find that BM had called him three times already - once at 6:00, once at 6:30, and once at 8:18. BF thinks she was trying to wake him up before we got up to have him snoop around the house. Good thing his cellphone was in a different room all night and he didn't answer it!
I swear this woman has some nerve. I've already gotten at least four emails and several messages on messenger. I'm trying to find a way to block her from contacting me on there too but it's hard. I use Trillian which logs me in to MSN, Yahoo, AOL, ICQ, and IRC at the same time, and I haven't found a "blocked users" list on it yet. I've blocked her from every other messenger though.
Basically she's gone back to the way she was. She's INFORMING me that SS is to answer his phone at all times, and that when she can't get him on his cell then she WILL call us on our phone, she KNOWS that if one of us is with SS, the other is at BF's business and we'd BETTER answer when she calls us or she'll alert our attorney (oh no!). She makes stupid bitchy comments when I'm away from the computer about how she's sure she knows why I'm away (wtf?). What's even more funny is that she goes from this, to emailing me saying "Have a nice day!" and "Hope you had a good day at work today!" WTF? Be a bitch, or be nice. Just pick one! Don't try to do both!
I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE RESTRAINING ORDER TO GET SERVED!!!
*~So sayeth Nymh~*
That Is Out and Out Harrasment
You guys don't have to talk with her at all if you don't want to. It I really don't think this BM is going to respect the RO at all. She will be getting into soooo much trouble. Mark my words!!!
In the mean time don't worry about her. She is the out and out aggressor in this case. It wont' be hard to prove
Oh My God, Nymh
That is one of my favorite lines. I have said it so many times in regards to some of the people in my life.!!!! "Just pick a personality and stick with it so I know how to deal with you."
Yikes! Hugs, Jo
"O.K., just give me the gun and I'll shoot my-self." Burt - Soap
Oh... I'm stealing that one!
ROTFLMAO!!!! LOVE IT!
Man has the intelligence to change his life,
Sometimes, he just fails to use it...