BM sinking fast
BM called BF yesterday to ask if she could borrow some money. Apparently if she didn't make a payment on her car by 10:00 AM today, she loses it. That to me states that she hasn't made a payment in several months. She told BF that she would get her unemployment check this Friday and she could pay him back - which means that she was lying about the part time job she said she had at their last court date.
BM has always been good about paying BF back when she borrows money, so he wasn't worried about loaning it to her. He took the high road and told her he would loan it to her which I am fine with. I told him he needed to ask her how long it was going to take of her sinking like this before she realized she couldn't handle it anymore and needed to get a job.
During the phone call she also said that she thought they both needed to drop their court cases against one another because it was "best for SS". So first she wanted BF to move back in with her because it was "best for SS", then she wanted him to sign his rights away because that was "best for SS", then she wanted to get rid of the visitation schedule and let SS come "whenever he wanted" because it was "best for SS"...every step of the way she has justified her ridiculous wants and actions by saying they are what is "best for SS". If I never hear those three words again out of her I will be happy because obviously she has no concept of what it really means. BF told her that he thought SS living with us was what was best for him because she obviously couldn't afford to take care of him by herself. He said that that started an argument but she didn't gripe too much because she was asking him for money and couldn't really be too argumentative.
- Nymh's blog
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He can't save her from herself...
He may be able to bail her out, but she's never going to change.
I agree with you on the "best for SS."
My skids' BM's favorite line is "for the girls..." When in reality it's rarely "for the girls" but more often times than not "for the BM".
I despise that line myself...can't help but roll my eyes when that comes flying out her mouth.
"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley
I agree with CG
the skids BM says the same things all the time......but in reality, it really IS all for herself!
She just
wants him to drop the court case becuz she is out of funds. I think this is a great time for negotiation. Don't you??
I agree
I think two things have happened - she has realized that she is out of money, and she has realized that she can't win in court. She would never offer to drop her own court case if she had the money to keep going or if she thought she still had a chance of winning.
*~So sayeth Nymh~*
I say if you can keep paying court fees, keep going
In our case finances was part of BM's conceding. I think that true of many/most custody cases where someone throws in the towel. So in this case, it will serve "SS's BEST INTEREST" to keep going til she concedes. I wouldn't loan her a dime more either. If she loses the car, her home, etc, then it will illustrate to the court that she's unfit.
Goodluck Nymh. It's good to hear from you!
"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra