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Kids Chore List

Ninji's picture

I'm making a chore list for SS9 and SD11

They already clean their rooms make their beds and clean their own bathroom.

This is what I've come up with so far:

Clean room and make beds--This includes closet and under bed
Wipe finger prints off hallway, bathroom and bedroom walls
Fills dogs water bowl morning and after dinner

Clean Kitchen after dinner--This includes all counters, stove, all dishes, table and sweep kitchen/dining room floor
Sweep back porch and front porch once a weekend

Put away clean dishes after snack (before bed if you didn't get a snack)
Clean bathroom - This includes sweeping floor, taking trash out, and cleaning behind the toilet as well as cleaning every surface. Pick up all dirty laundry and put items away that don't belong in bathroom
Do laundry every Sunday--To include drying, folding and putting away.

They are with us every weekend Friday-Sunday. What are you opinions? Too much?

We did a chore board a couple years ago and it was just clean room, brush teeth/hair and take a shower. They got an allowance for it. I stopped it because I was sick of still having to tell them to do their chores and pay them

Comments

Totalybogus's picture

I think its too much. They are only there for 2 days. It shouldn't be spent cleaning. I would agree with your list, especially for the 11 year old if they were with you full time.

Ninji's picture

Except for the kitchen, nothing on the list takes more than 10 minutes. We also don't think the kids should spend the entire weekend playing video games. But thanks for your opinion.

DaizyDuke's picture

I agree. I have issue with the bathroom. Is the bathroom that they clean solely used by them? I don't think it fair that they come for two days and have to clean a bathroom that people (other than them) have been using for 5.

DaizyDuke's picture

Then really, their "chores" are more cleaning up after themselves? (their own rooms, their own bathroom, their own laundry, their own dishes etc) I 10000% agree with THAT!

fakemommy's picture

I agree. Kids should be taught to be contributing members of the household, no matter how much time they spend there.

My skid wipes floor boards and cleans windows and empties the dishwasher. Just some things you may want to add. Dusting corners (cobwebs) and fans are good chores too (adding that to my arsenal now).

Cover1W's picture

I created a chore chart last year when SDs were 10 and 8. They were really, really exited about it for the first 3 months; hey it was guaranteed $! Then during the summer it got "really hard to remember to put a sticker on the chart" at the end of each day. So I dumbed it down to a sticker a week. Still too hard. They started putting stickers on things they had not done. Then got mad when they were called on it. "I did TOO to that!" as the dishes still sat uncleared on the table...

Then DP decided it really WAS too hard for them and he re-did the chart so it would be 'easier.' As soon as that was done and posted, SDs completely ignored the chart. So they get no allowance now Mostly because they don't do any extra stuff to help out unless asked or told by DP. I completely gave up except for certain things I have told DP I will continue to do because otherwise I will lose my mind.

Dramatic failure mostly due to DP thinking 'they are just kids, why do they need to do chores? I never did them?' Cue me throwing all his laundry, dishes, and other random messes at him (figuratively). Really?!

Ninji's picture

Our last Chore chard didn't last too long either.

Hopefully, this one will. I'm really lucky that SO is totally on board with them doing chores. They have done all the things on the list, just not on a regular.

splashofginger's picture

I use a free app called chore monster for my BS 9. Each chore is worth points and he cashes in his points for "screen time". I also give points for things I want to reinforce for example a healthy snack choice adds points and an unhealthy snack costs points. Anyway, my son checks off what he has done from an old ipad he has and it goes right to my phone. I then approve or deny the points (depending upon if it was done well). I also know when he is turning in points for game time and deny or approve that. It works well for me. Check it out. I could never keep a chart going for long or keep track of allowance. This is painless.

Willow2010's picture

IMHO...It is too much. Especially if you expect them to do it every time they are at your house.

moeilijk's picture

It sounds like *maybe* 90 minutes of chores, but not more than about 20 minutes at any go. For the people that think that's too much to do in a weekend... why is that?

Totalybogus's picture

I think they should have to keep their rooms clean, clean up after themselves and clear the table, but I don't think they should have to do bathrooms, all of the kitchen chores and now floor boards. They are not maids. IMHO, they are too young for all of that even if they were there all the time, especially a 9 year old doing the laundry. I think they're being taken advantage of. It looks like a Cinderella syndrome.

moeilijk's picture

For me, I would say it depends on the degree to which these chores are assigned vs laddered. I agree 9 is young for completely independent laundry. But not too young for any of the steps. Like, a 9 yo can carry a laundry basket, can fold and put away clothes, can add detergent and press start. Same for kitchen chores. So I would look at how the gap between task ability and self-sufficiency is bridged before claiming Cinderella syndrome.

Ninji's picture

So far, I put the laundry in the washer, add detergent and press start. They put the laundry in the dryer, fold and put away. I'm going to start teaching them to add their own detergent and start the machine. I will supervise them until they are confident enough to do it alone.

splashofginger's picture

My 9 yo couldn't do kitchen or laundry independently but he is really good at vacuuming and dusting.

fakemommy's picture

My parents are still married and I had an hour of chores on week nights and HOURS of chores on the weekends. My mom left us long lists of chores on Saturday and Sunday mornings, her list is nothing. There is nothing wrong with teaching your kids to contribute to the household. That is teaching them responsibility and how to maintain a clean house, not treating them like a maid or (*snicker*) Cinderella.

Totalybogus's picture

If they were there full time, I would agree. I am a strong proponent for chores. However, being they are only there on weekends, it smacks of Cinderella. When do they actually have time to visit with dad?

moeilijk's picture

That doesn't make any sense to me. So, it's SM's job to do the chores so that skids and DH can visit? Or do chores just not get done so that skids and DH can visit?

In an average two-day weekend, children are awake at least 12 hours per day which totals a minimum of 24 hours per child. Two children will share 90 minutes of chores. Which is then about 45 minutes of chores per child per weekend.

Which leaves 23h 15 min for DH and skids to visit every weekend. That's enough, right?

Ninji's picture

I find it ironic all the crap about Disneydads on this site and I have an SO that makes his kids be responsible and now I get push back that skids should not have responsibilities and should spend every minute they are with us like its a vacation.

AllySkoo's picture

For myself, I think it's too much because it's about balance. The skids are there every weekend, call it 30% of the time, right? I'm there 100% of the time. The time they spend doing chores - in my opinion should be about 30% of the time I spend doing chores. I don't think DH and I spend 560 minutes doing chores per week (280 each), so I'd find it kind of unfair to have the skids do 90. Clean up their own messes (bedrooms / bathrooms)? Yep, that's on them. (Although if they're only there on weekends, I hardly think the bathroom needs to be scrubbed weekly. Unless someone else is using it during the week.) But not the communal stuff.

Ninji's picture

The only communal items are filling the dogs water dish and dinner dishes. The rest is their area. I agree that normally, cleaning the bathroom shouldn't be every weekend, but they destroy it every weekend. The smell actually makes it into the living room with them using it only Fri-Sun. That is why we went to every weekend. That has been in place for over a year now. And that is with me occasionally deep cleaning it every couple of months.

AllySkoo's picture

Ah, OK, that wasn't clear to me in your original post! Yeah, if all you're basically doing is having them clean their own bedrooms and bathroom, do their own laundry and dishes, and then help take care of the dog and help clean up after dinner, then I don't think that's too much! Lol Not that it matters a bit what I think. Wink

moeilijk's picture

ETA: AllySkoo - your response bumped in somewhere but this is in reply to your reply to my comment (if you follow me... lol!)

I can see that way of looking at it. I guess I just think - if there are 90 minutes of chores before we can all relax together, what are the kids doing while I'm cleaning up after them? Like I mentioned to the poster above you, I think it depends on how things are handled.

I think children need to know that daily life revolves around very mundane chores. Every day messes and tidying up, constantly. So much better to accept that yes, this is a bit boring and yes, it takes longer than we'd like - and develop the competency in the skill as well as the building of a routine. Why not clean the kitchen after supper on the weekend? If the OP is suggesting that the only time her kitchen gets cleaned is when the skids come over to scrub it with toothbrush, that's one thing. But I thought - and maybe it was an ASSumption lol - that the OP was saying that she keeps her kitchen at that standard... so how much work would it be to return it to that level after dinner?

I know it was a shock for me to learn how much time it can take to keep your house clean, when you only clean it before people come over. lol. But, I left home young, and had only a few chores growing up - things I could handled independently, but not much working WITH someone who could teach me about how to do things.

I think you have small children, right? So what I'm talking about is... let's say your kid wants to cut his own food. But it's neater and faster and easier if you just do it. So you keep doing it.....

Or, you accept that it will take 5x longer and involve some gravy on the wall, and allow your kid to figure it out - while you sit there, and show and coach and clap.

I just think - 90 minutes of chores... that's what has to happen anyways. So why not together, or with guidance/supervision and then all play together?

But like I say, maybe I have misinterpreted the OP.

Ninji's picture

I keep my house pretty clean except for the dog toys all over the place. Smile

Normally, I do all the cooking and SO does all the dishes. I added clean the kitchen because they like to put dirty dishes with food still on them in the sink and we have a glass kitchen table that they leave food and crumbs all over. When I have asked them to wipe the table down, the wipe all the food right onto the floor. Hopefully cleaning the kitchen after dinner (Fri and Sat only Sun is just too hectic) will teach them to clean up after themselves better.

I really appreciate everyone's comments. Thanks

AllySkoo's picture

moeilijk - I follow you! Smile Yeah, I have small kids with DH - actually, that's kind of who I'm thinking of as I debate this in my head, since the SDs have aged out of visitation. And you've got a point about letting them learn new skills, for sure! Lol I cannot tell you how many times I've had to just close my eyes and count to myself while waiting for a child to buckle his own seat belt / put on his own coat / pick up her toys when I could have gotten it done in 5 seconds! (Interestingly, DH has far less patience for this and will sometimes just do whatever it is for the child - and all 3 HATE that!)

I'm with you on the "we have 90 minutes of chores, let's get it done" too. I'm all for kids helping! (Even when, at the moment, their 'help' is more 'hindrance'. It's about teaching, for me, for now.) I suppose though, that at first read this sounded more like, "Hey, if you had free slave labor what would you force them to do? And how much do you think I can get away with before it looks bad?" In other words, it sounded more like "taking advantage" of the skids, rather than "teaching the skids". (NOTE: With the OP's explanation, it doesn't sound like that to me any more!!)

To be fair, I was sort of predisposed to see it that way. BM literally told the skids, "That's why I had kids, so I didn't have to do chores." She was "joking" - but she really did make them do all the household stuff (literally ALL of it - including her laundry). She took advantage. Lol I can't see that it did them any good, honestly. I've been to the apartment the oldest two share. If it's been deep cleaned in the last 30 years, or even lightly cleaned in the last 30 months, I'd be surprised. It's like they said to themselves, "We've been cleaning for years, so fuck it. Let's just live in dirt."

Willow2010's picture

Ok...now I know that I am the minority here but during the school year, I did not over load my kids with chores like that.

Yes...they cleaned up after themselves but that was really it. Their job was to do good in school, spend time with family and friends and just be a kid.

Now I did load them up some during the summer though.

Teas83's picture

I think this is appropriate. You're basically just asking them to clean up after themselves.

I grew up on a farm/ranch, and your list is NOTHING compared to what I did for chores as a kid. We did all of your inside chores in addition to at least an hour of outside chores (hauling buckets of grain to cows and horses, etc.) every weekday. On the weekends, we spent hours outside doing extra work around the yard or involving the animals.

moeilijk's picture

Wow, my flabber is completely gasted at how many of you think two children sharing 90 minutes of chores over two days would prevent the children from spending time with their father.

Just :jawdrop: :jawdrop: :jawdrop: :jawdrop: :jawdrop:

Shaman29's picture

This list is fine. It's teaching them that Dad's house isn't only for Happy Fun Time. That life does go on, responsibilities happen and how to clean up after themselves.

If the nay-sayers are so freaking worried they're not spending time with daddy-poo, then HE can help them with their chores.