My SD9 and my niece do NOT get along. My niece lives right down the hall from SD9's gma and her gma has expressed to SD9 that she doesn't like my niece although it is BOTH SD9 AND my niece's fault. They are mean to one another most of the time. My BD11 and my niece are really close. They are cousins after all and my BD11 is here for the weekend. I had JUST gotten back from getting my BS4 and was standing in my sister's apartment my niece, BD11 and SD9 were all standing in her kitchen and my niece asked if my BD11 could stay the night. There was a lot going on plus I was thinking it over and the next thing I knew SD9 was nowhere to be found. I asked where she went and nobody knew. About 10 minutes go by- time in which I decided that BD11 could not stay with niece- when SD9 showed back up and I could tell she had been crying. I asked her why she was crying and she told me she hadn't been. I told her I could tell she had been and she still denied it. I asked where she had gone and she said she went to her gma's. I told her I was going to call her gma and ask HER if and why she had been crying and so SD9 finally tells me that she had been crying because my niece had asked my BD11 to stay the night and she didn't want my SD9 to stay the night. I kind of let it slide since I wasn't allowing BD11 to stay the night anyway. I decided to take BD11, BS4, BS8 and SD9 with to our local department store and to the grocery store because I wanted to get something quick for dinner. My niece decided she wanted to come with and so her mom gave her $4.00 (awesome of her because I already have 5 children I need to buy for while I'm out). Somewhere in all the chaos my niece gave one of her dollars to my BS8. As soon as I found out I made him give it back. I realized SD9 was once again missing. By now I figured she ran to her gma's once again without asking. We waited and waited on SD9, I figured she wasn't coming and so my niece, BS8, BS4 and BD11 headed to the car. Just as we all got situated here comes SD9 running to the car waving $2.00 in the air. I asked her where she got it and she said she told her gma we were going to the store and her gma gave her $2.00. Her gma knew full well that my Bkids are here too. I was angry and fed up by this time so I drove to DH's work and told him all that had happened AND I got to the bottom of the problem between my SD9 and my niece. Both my BD11 and niece swear up and down that my SD9 got involved in an argument that was between my BD11 and my niece. My SD9 started calling my niece names although she wasn't even involved in the argument and BD11 and niece BOTH swear that she's bossy and unpleasant to play with. I even have other nieces and nephews that used to enjoy coming over but they won't anymore because of SD9. SD9 has a LOT of problems holding steady friends and I've TRIED talking to her about it. DH's is being awesome about the situation. He scolded SD9 and decided she needs to be grounded to her room for running to gma with things that I hadn't even had a chance to take care of yet. He had a talk with gma about getting involved in family problems that she doesn't have all the facts to and he told her that he's at work I'M in charge. Not HER. My problem now is that I had a lot of fun family activities scheduled for this weekend- pumpkin carving, making homemade picture frames and a lot of other crafts- should SD9's grounding start today or should we wait until my Biokids go home? That would mean that her grounding wouldn't start until Monday... or should we consider a different punishment altogether?