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New marriage, but doesn't seem like it.

MrsFitMama's picture

Submitted by MrsFitMama on Sun, 04/17/2011 - 11:40pm

I'm tired. Almost completed our 4 months since being married. I have a husband who insults and belittles me and finds that ok when he feels he is right... oh yeah... Mr. Right... all the time. I have repeatedly requested him not to speak to me in that way in front of the girls. No wonder they have a hard time respecting me.
He thinks my source of depression and anxiety is due to me not being on meds. No... no no... it's due to his attitude and perceptions. I mean, come on... how wrong can he be right? He's read all the books on psychology, positive thinking, "Schmoozing," empowerment. That makes him an expert eh? But I will tell you this, when he gets insultful and belittling and stresses me out (Oh I forget, he says I give him the power to stress me out, I am responsible for controlling how I feel. Oops! My bad) that's when my OCD flares up.

I like how he tries to make me feel guilty that he has a shitty car and when I want to use mine, (he drives his girls to school), you want me to risk breaking down????!!! DUDE! MY CAR!!! I have things I want to do! How dare you make me feel guilty! If you need a new car, you should have gotten one!!!

I despise my husband sometimes...

Comments

Done WIth It's picture

Submitted by Done WIth It on Mon, 04/18/2011 - 12:27am

This is so easy...divorce him. Unbelieable you are just seeing this man for what he is. Who needs the garbage he's throwing at you?? And talks down to you in front of his children. No respect from him, no respect from them. You have absolutely no furture with this loser of a human.

Pack it up, and leave him with his shi%%y attitude along with his shi%%y car!!

Done WIth It's picture

Submitted by Done WIth It on Mon, 04/18/2011 - 12:46am

Alrighty...just checked the blog.

First paragraph....it's all about disappointment.
Second paragraph.....you're upbeat about your job and want to help others.

okay...the guy reveals himself to be rude and cruel. Get out of it now now now now before you have chldren and wind up like others in here.

Whatever you do, don't get pregnant with this worm of a man. If you live alone, you're better off than the mental abuse this guy is going to throw on you!

sasha101's picture

Submitted by sasha101 on Mon, 04/18/2011 - 8:05am

I agree with the others, get away from this abusive bully now before he destroys you. My ex husband was just the same; a bully who insulted, humiliated and controlled me. Same as you, everything was always my fault - whenever he got angry it was because I'd been stupid enough to make him angry and if I was a better wife and did things right then everything would be okay. He made me physically and mentally ill and even though I've been with my lovely 2nd hubby for 5 years, I still suffer the effects of what my ex put me through. I only put up with it for so long because I got pregnant and felt trapped, and couldn't face the prospect of being a single parent to a disabled child as I wouldn't have been able to work to support us. Looking back, I wish I had taken my chances and left sooner as nothing could have been as bad as the life I had to live. Your husband will not change as he will never take responsibility for his abusive behaviour, and he will go on blaming you, disrespecting you and making you miserable while ever you stay with him. The kids will grow up seeing and hearing the abuse and will learn that it's acceptable to treat you like that too. He's messing with your mind, and no amount of meds will change the situation. I learned a long time ago that medication might give you the mental resources to cope better with your situation but if that situation is an unhappy one, unless you remove yourself from it, meds alone cannot solve your problem. He's not worth ruining your life and your health for and you deserve better. Get as much help from your family and friends as you can and LEAVE. Or contact a womens refuge if you don't have anyone else to help you. It's hard to leave a violent relationship and takes some doing, but being on your own even if you struggle at first with money etc has got to be better than living like this for the rest of your life.

Auteur's picture

Submitted by Auteur on Mon, 04/18/2011 - 9:30am

Mine did this WITHOUT putting the ring on the finger. He showed me that once he stepped over MY threshold, that he was "man of the house" and "whatever his kids did or said I am supposed to just take whatever they dish out"

Will NEVER marry again!! Nor will I EVER get involved with a man with children again!!