So as I commented on someone else's blog, I realized I wanted to say thank you to the posters here.

I've learned so much about parenting, about being a partner, a DIL, a SIL, about boundaries and so much more from you. Sometimes by reading the trainwrecks people find themselves in, and trying to help them disentangle themselves. Sometimes by reading the advice those people get. Sometimes by how I feel inside when I read some advice or ideas.

DD is 2 now, and I really relied on what I learned here when she was first born. I was terrified of her - might sound weird, but really, she was fragile, gave zero instructions and lots of complaints, and this was the job I wanted to get right the most ever! I didn't trust anyone else to take care of her, not even DH.

But I let him (and my MIL/SIL/FIL, etc) take care of her anyway. In their way. My MIL and SIL commented again the other day that they really liked how free I was with her. I admitted, I didn't feel that way at all. At that time, my relationship with them was not good and hadn't been good for a couple of years. But I cared more about allowing them to have their own relationship with DD, partly for DD's benefit, but mostly for mine. I don't belong in the middle of DD's relationships.

And that's not just about respect, it's about boundaries. I have learned (and am still learning) about what is just not my d@mn business. I am so much calmer now, as a result of learning from your collective experiences.

So thank you.