Back in January of 2012, DH got full custody of SD. SD seemed happy with the situation. She seemed to really like the idea of having consistency. We had to put her in counseling due to her 'issues' and she has seemed to slowly get worse since.

I have tried having a decent relationship with her, but was never too pushy. I gauged our interactions on how SD was 'feeling' on any given day. Some days SD was very happy and talkative with me and other days she seemed to avoid me like a plague. I am now usually always avoided. I have slowly disengaged from her (I think) We seem to only coexist together here. We're polite and civil to each other, but other than that, there isn't much interaction.

I know SD doesn't like having me around. And that feeling is starting to become mutual. SD is very manipulative, passive aggressive, and seems to be becoming vengeful almost. Being around her is like being on an emotional roller coaster. She can't handle her emotions and seems to shut down completely and sulk for days if corrected, told to be nice, not be rude or mean, and if she is called out on the many sneaky and mean things she does.

It's gotten to the point that the only time we speak is when we need to ask each other questions. Other than that, there is no interaction between us. I really don't like it this way, but I will not be pushy and can not force anything. I've tried talking to her, but it's like pulling teeth. So, I just go on about my day with DD and DS. We've tried including her in things we do around here, but she would rather sulk than be included. The only time she seems almost happy is when she has DH all to herself or if she finds a way to exclude DD from her and DH. DH has picked up on this and put a stop to it and that pisses SD off like no other. Whatever.

What is your definition of Disengaging?