I work days, my girlfriend works nights.  The primary relationship problem is with her and her son, although it's like a tornado that sucks us all in (others being me, and my daughter).  When she works, her son disappears- goes to friends houses, etc for hours.  Kinda like a normal teenager.  When she's there, he is all over her- wants her attention, approval, invariably they argue and fight.  Why doesn't he leave when she's there, if they're going to fight anyway?  Is this an oeidipus complex?  I don't get it.  For anyone who read "the most recent meltdown", this is TZ and JZ.  TZ is the same kid diagnosed with IED, and when he has one of his meltdowns with Mom acts as if everything is peachy in a day or two.  Sorry, but I don't work that way.