Hmmm, tough one. I think for me it would depend on how long you've been in this child's life and if the bio parent was available to do it themselves. If bio is there, I think it should be left to them, but I also know there are times when bio isn't available. In that case I think it's ok.

I changed my Skids diapers so wiping his butt would not have bothered me. But, 4 is getting a little old and should be near the end of the "mommy/daddy wipe my butt" stage.

I vote ..... Maybe.

If you meant Whipping as in blistering some kid ass .... my vote is ABOSLUTELY if the infraction warrants it. }:)

:jawdrop: God NO! I thought it was bad enough I had to teach SD how to wipe properly when she was 6. She'd rock up every second weekend wearing more skidmarks than a Formula 1 Grand Prix circuit!

No no no! If FH expected me to wipe a 4 year old butt, I'd have run for the hills!

I too had to change ss's nasty diapers when he was a kiddo-but at age 4 I did not wipe for him. The last time I did that was probably as he was potty training in the 2.5 range. If the kid is having trouble, purchase some of the wet wipes and have your spouse instruct him on their use.

not even a stepmom, and as soon as the relationship started getting serious, boyfriend flat out told me i had to wipe his 3 year olds butt if hes not around, I told him it probably wouldn't happen. lol so the first time the situation came up, he yelled I'm done. I walked in and instructed him on how to do it him self, and got him to wet some toilet paper for a 2nd wipe just incase. Hes been a self butt wiping kid ever sense! and he was very excited afterwards that he was able to do it on his own.

but no at that age, it shouldn't be anyone's job except for the one who used the potty, unless there is something wrong with them and they seriously can't do it there selves.

although I must say it was an extremely easy habit to break (1 day), I seriously believe he could have been doing that on his own way before then. I vote break the habit asap if its possible.

LOL...Not sure whether we are talking about spanking or cleaning up after going potty.

If we are talking about spanking, then absolutely no. The legal ramifications could be catastrophic. No way would I risk that. And we are full-time custodial. But honestly, we don't spank any of our kids. We just feel like there are better ways to discipline than resorting to hitting.

If we are talking about wiping bottoms, then I think if you have a young stepchild who needs help, you should help.