I think if parents got back into parenting their kids there wouldn't be a need for this.

The reason this is coming up is b/c parents today are not making their kids mind, be respectful and mindful of other people, it is all about ME ME ME!

No one wants to be around people and their kids that are like that it is not enjoyable. The 'free range' parenting is not working and society is seeing and trying to 'fight' back. Good about time! Hopeful this will start changing the attitude society has and it will soon be the norm for parents to be PARENTS! including parents that are divorced which are the worst!

as Dave Ramsey said yesterday on his podcast, parents need to grow a backbone with their children, letting kids run the show like this makes about as much sense as letting inmates run the insane asylum. And yes kids try to run the show which is why they act up and society is getting sick of it. I have kids too but there is nothing worse than a brat ruining a nice dinner at an expensive restuarant. When I took my daughter and grandson out to eat my grandson pulled this, I pulled him outside along with my daughter and told my daughter to get him undercontrol or DONT COME BACK IN. Kids always went everywhere before but they never acted this bad and if they did the parent excused themself and kid and addressed it.

If parents would just be responsible and be PARENTS there wouldn't be a need for this.. it's because the world is now over-run with bad parents, grandparents raising kids, or nobody raising kids that kids in general are getting a bad name.

I have a 19 month old BS. For the most part he is a great little boy, but being a 19 month old, he is prone to a tantrum here and there. For exactly this reason, is why I (being the responsible parent) do not subject him (and others) to things that I KNOW are probably going to elicit a tantrum for instance:

When I get groceries, we go first thing Sunday morning, as soon as BS is up, has had like 1/2 an hour to play, has had something to eat and has gotten dressed we are out the door and to the grocery store. We are usually there between 8:30-9:30 am. There aren't a whole heck of alot of other people there at this time on a Sunday which is perfect. BS sits in the cart and is always well behaved because he is well rested and just ate. Do I really want to haul my butt out of the house on a Sunday morning that early? No, but I do it because I know that if I go later (when I want to go) that BS will most certainly get tired, get cranky, and possibly have a tantrum that I have set him up for.

I have not taken BS out to a restaurant to eat since he started walking. Actually the day he turned 1 year old was the last time he was at a restaurant. I know that my 19 month old can only tolerate sitting still for just so long and to expect him to sit, wait for everyone to order and then wait for the food to come and be eaten is asking too much of him, so we just don't go out to eat. Heck it saves us a boat load of money!

If DH wants us to go somewhere and it is getting near BS bed time or nap time then I politely decline. I just will not set BS (or myself) up for failure when it can be so easily avoided.

It is not going to be the end of my world to do things a little differently while BS is at this age to spare myself and everyone else from the wrath of a tired/hungry toddler. But then again I care... I just don't think anyone cares anymore whether they are pissing someone off or not.

Total lack of both common sense and parenting ability. Took my daughter to a local outdoor theater performance. This is a professional setup, not blankets on the grass. Doesn't even start until 8 pm and ends at 11 pm. Attendees are to be quiet and respectful. In walks a couple with a baby in a carrier. What?! Get a babysitter. We're outside, it's hot, other people are around. Poor baby.

But the one who took the cake was the mom who let her son RUN between the rows of seats for the entire intermission. He was running laps THROUGH the theater seating area. Pretty soon he was joined by another, bigger boy and they were throwing water on each other while only standing about two seats away from a group of elderly ladies. It was crazy. And both moms totally knew what the kids were doing and did NOTHING to stop it.

I completely understand it though I agree with Cookie that if parents actually parented their children that there would be a very limited market for kid free vacation destinations, resaurants, theaters, etc.....

I am one of those people who will get a child under control in public if their parents won't. If I am at a restaurant and a little shit is running amok I will request that the manager have the child removed from the restaurant. If that does not work I have stood up and loudly asked "Who does this ill behaved brat belong to? Please take them home or get them under control!"

When I observe a family with well behaved an polite kids at a restaurant I make it a point to compliment them if they are still there when I am leaving.

When I was in Grad school and my wife was in her undergrad program I used to take our son to Mc D's where they had a huge indoor air conditioned play scape to play while I studied. On one occassion there were about three little kids ~4yo who decided that standing in a circle while in one of the playscape pods with mesh sides and screaming at the top of their lungs was a good idea. It was not a yell it was an ear splitting high frequency scream. I calmly approached their parents and asked them to please stop the ear splitting screaming. It was painful and several other kids were running to their parents with their hands covering their ears and a few even younger kids were crying. Of course I was verbally accosted about lightening up, it was a kids play scape, what did I expect, you can't stop my kid from playing, etc........ So, I grabbed one of my text books and proceeded to beat on one of the playscape tubes as I yelled at the top of my lungs "SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!" The book made a very loud booming sound and it got very quiet instantly. Then I said "Thank you for for not screaming. Please have fun, laugh, yell but no more screaming .... Thank you".

All of the kids were a bit subdued for a few minutes but the play fairly quickly resumed.

I had several other parents thank me for stopping the screaming.

I have no problem applying public humiliation and ridicule to get other people's hell spawn under control if they won't.

Pathetic. Anyone with unruly kids or even UNRULY adults should be asked to leave. However, if you want a quiet evening, STAY HOME! Why is it that some people feel they have a right to go out and have a quiet time? Really?

Once outside a restaurant I was laughing with my husband as we walked out...some idiot lady put her hand to my face while she was on her cell phone and told me to "shut up" because she couldn't hear...I told her to go to hell and to stay in her car or home if she wanted silence while she talked on her darn phone.

People in the US think they have a right to tell others what to do constantly. If your kid hits me, etc...I have a right to be ticked off...other than that, you need to stay home if you want it to be quiet.

PS - my son has traveled since he was born. Even at his "so-called terrible 2s", "even with his ADHD and autism", I constantly got compliments from passengers sitting in front or back of us once the plane landed, as well as flight attendants who said "I HAD NO CLUE there was even a kid there"...so I don't like unruly kids, but people need to stay home if they want peace and quiet.

LMAO rags I LOVE that in you! Awesomeness! I have done similar but mainly not so loud as you. That was a good one. LOL

I have said very loudly so the parents can hear what their kids are doing and how it is very wrong though.

thanks for the post FM87, it has made my day...

if only i could ban skids from my home on co skid visitation days...

I completely agree with those who said that if people parented their kids, this would be completely unnecessary.

When I was growing up, I wouldn't have dared to act the way some of these people now let their kids act in public. I would have faced having a huge privelege taken away for a significant amount of time.

I went out to eat with my mom the other night. Behind us, there was a toddler who was talking back to adults loudly. He refused to eat what was on his plate, and was hitting the table hard with his fists in disgust. What were the parents doing? They were saying (in quiet, non-stern voices), "oh, (little boy's name), sit down," "oh, (insert little boy's name) don't you do that," "(insert little boy's name), why don't you use your big-boy manners?"

Then dessert time came. He wanted some sort of fancy, non-kids-menu dessert. The woman sitting there told him he could only get the kids-sized ice cream dessert. He threw a FIT reminiscent of one Veruca Salt might throw.

Everyone around them literally stopped. All eyes were on them. After a few minutes, the flabberghasted manager had to come over and ask them to leave. I could hear others whispering, "oh my goodness, I'm glad that's over!" after they left. My mom and I talked about it quietly. We both reminisced and said that neither of us would have dared to act like that growing up. But then again, my mom and her parents did their job well as PARENTS.

self imposed limits? HHAHAHAHA

I've heard brats wailing in EVERY imaginable place and time. parents don't want their precious to be quiet? fine by me, keep em home then. where nobody but you has te hear em....

I wouldn't have dreamed of interrupting adults as a kid- all I see these days is dependent and rude brats everyplace. eff that. let em be annoying at home then.

im completely in favor of this.

eta: no, I don't expect 'silence in public'. but I also expect reasonable behavior. children are not yet responsible or capable of being polite, quiet, and still. they act in ways that would get an adult kicked out or sometimes arrested. if you want your kid to have "rights" they'll also have responsibilities...
no adult runs in circles, wailing and moaning, in a sushi bar. and if they do, the police get called.

While it's pretty pathetic that it's come to this, I don't think it's a bad idea for private businesses. I just hope this doesn't become a political issue. Restaurants and movie theaters banning children is fine, but if some whiny self-righteous mommy interest group lobbies to get a ban on such kid-bans, this is just going to turn ugly. Child civil rights my arse.

It's simply cultural, nothign more IMO. ALso-it may be true that kids are more unruly these days-and at the same time adults are a lot less tolerant of noise/stress period. Blame it on our daily lives being busier, more stressful, less time to relax, to much on the go activities....we are more burned out then ever before. We also self-medicate more, we are on more medications-a lot of KIDS are on medications making the 'zombie effect' seem like something to strive for.

I have very mixed feelings about this-I like adult quiet time like everyone else...if I want a kid free experience I go to a bar or book an adults only hotel. Restaurants? I expect to see them but may ask to sit further away from a certain table. I've also taught my children to behave in public. I wont' say I never had meltdowns-but I dealt with them. But I taught them to eat out, they've been flying since infancy. They even travel alone now and I get nothign but compiments from the flight attendants-even the dink gay ones..go figure lol.

The people in the US ARE more uptight about kids and noise and normal kid play/behavior. I grew up in a country that does NOT practice child adoration but they are 100 times more tolerant- you will very often see kids running amock at any situation/place. The adults dont' seem to mind or get annoyed as much nor 'micromanage' every behavior-they roll w/the punches and intervene if it's serious.

The life is hard financialy but more relaxed then ours when it comes to other aspect of life-they value family meals,time together, lots of children, lots of friends and extended family-hours at the dinner table-teens hang around their parents/family/friends as one big group. There is no big push for 'independence' as there is here...they are noisy themselves (the adults)-a very heavy Italian influence helps to make it this way.

If an American goes to a family dinner there they are likely to feel scared, intimidated and shy away from the noise thinking they are fighting/yelling...it's cultural. Hence why the adults being so loud (particularly after long dinners with wine) probably drown the kids noise out LOL.

Overall teens and kids are very loving and affectionate with parents and don't seem to go as wild or misbehave as much. THey (parents) don't 'hoover' 'helicopterparent' 'micromanage'-neither do they 'free-range'. I don't know-i think our culture here is just messed up-has never been able to find it's balance in that sense like other cultures have. Most likely because it's a melting pot.

IMO private bsns should be allowed to do what they want-IMO the gvmnt/state should never intervene/uphold/enforce these bans....but then again I feel the same way about smoking bans. Should be up to the establishment...unfortunately it has not gone that way.

People never see the slippery slope of losing individual freedoms/rights...especially if it benefits them. Until you have the police state we live in today, which most people go on living CLUELESS about lol

The "even the dink gay ones..go figure"...comment wasn't necessary, despite the very good points that you made here overit.

My husband and I went to breakfast this morning and it turns out that it was 'baby-day' at the restaurant. Oh, not officially, but the few people in the restaurant without children could not hear the conversation at their own table because of the large number of little ones screaming and crying. I certainly don't expect people not to take their children to breakfast, but it was extremely annoying to have so much. We left without finishing our food because it was just too much. Sadly not one of the parents in the place tried to do anything, except to talk over the crying and screaming. I understand why people do not want to be around that.

Recently I went to lunch with my mom. There was a mom and her three little children sitting close to us. The children were so well behaved. They ate with manners. They sat at the table. They spoke in normal voice levels. They entertained themselves with crayons and paper. They asked with 'please' and 'thank you.' My mom made a point of complimenting that mom and those children as we left the restaurant. The mom was slightly embarrassed, but also obviously quite proud at the compliment.

My parents took us out to dinner my entire life, even when my brother and I were quite young. They taught us manners and appropriate behavior, if we didn't behave correctly there were consequences. I am grateful that my parents raised me the way that they did; they taught us to think about how our actions affect others. I don't think society, in general, does that any more. Most people tend to be so focused on their own needs or wants (or THEIR children's) that they don't see the big picture.

I wish it was easier, as my husband and I tried to raise SD16 with the same values that my parents raised me, but with the influence of BM, friends and society in general we were always 'wrong' 'not normal' and 'too strict.' I guess I don't know any other way to be. And the truth is that her behavior and appearance were always complimented when with us, the opposite is happening now that she is with BM.

I have mixed feelings. I took my two youngest, dd9 and ds12 to an indoor waterpark this weekend-and yes, it is certainly not a place you would expect quiet, but I was still appalled. The rules were clearly posted that no kids were to enter without permission-however i sat and saw numerous kids coming in on their own. When they got in they did not follow the posted rules. In fact not only did they not follow rules they told my ds to break the rules which he refused and said, "no, I am waiting my turn". Breakfast was buffet style the next morning. At the table next to us one family was allowing their 4 year old to stand in the window sill in the middle of the restaurant. Quiet hours were clearly posted at 11pm. There were kids screaming up and down the hall at 1am. I have a hard time undertstanding why parents allow their kids to break rules in a public setting such as this, but then think they should listen at home. We've always taken our kids out to eat since they were little. Even ss who is the devil, can display appropriate manners in a restaurant. We have been commended on our kids good behavior at restauarants. If my child WAS being disruptive in a restaurant, then we would leave. I dont even know why anyone parent would want the humiliation of their kid acting like a heathen in public.

However, I think there is also a fine line. Sometimes, kids, especially youngers ones cry. Every time a baby cries should they be banned from a restaurant? For doing something that is developmentally normal? Additionally, many kids with various disabilities have difficuty regulating their emotions-not really a lack a parenting issue-but a disability issue-is it truly fair to exclude these kids from a number of public places? Isnt teaching tolerance for those that are different than us something that we as a society want to teach our generation?

What I think is the answer here-is that each establishment set appropriate limits-quiet hours, adult evenings, etc-if the rules of the establishment are broken then that individual or party should be asked to leave. I also have seen extremely disruptive adults in restaurants and so forth. I still remember being 18 years old and eating at Denny's around 10pm and essentially being sexually harassed by a drunk man at the next table-the staff actually stood around and watched. We ended up leaving. I also have another Denny's story from just last year. A man started insulting a young Asian man at the next table. Making inappropriate racial slurs-this went on for a good 15 minutes or so-building in intensity. Finally the manager did come over and ask him to leave. He and his gf stormed out but actually came back 10 minutes later as he evidently he wasnt done-and he yelled at this poor asian kid and his family as well as the manager and accused THEM of discrimination because they asked him to leave. in other words, bad behavior is not limited to spoilt children. There are also many inappropriate adults and I think establishments need to be proactive in asking anyone to leave that is disruptive.

"What's the matter with kids these days and why doesn't anyone want them around?" You are kidding, right? This must be a joke. Because they are whiny, rude, entitled little jerks. Not that it is their fault - it is totally the fault of their parents who have completely abdicated their responsibilities. However, that doesn't mean that I want to be around the "special little snowflakes." In fact, I would rather be anywhere but - including my own home when my skids are gracing us with their royal presence!