Last week, I had some issues with my boyfriend asking me to watch his 2 kids for 3 weeks in June and possibly again in July+ August depending on how things go. With this situation, he didn't say I had to watch them, and didn't say he would be mad at me if I didn't, but I was going off of his past reactions whenever he wanted me to watch them and I said no.

Since I already told him I would watch them these three weeks, I didn't want to go back on my word, so I am watching them this mon-weds as well like planned. He completely understood when I told him I will not be watching them anymore this summer though.

With watching the kids during the week, there became a problem of what to do on the weekends. He wanted to go do something hours away that would require me to get up early on the weekends, on top of my already messed up sleep during the week from having to come watch the kids. He kept expecting me to get up early even though I told him no. However, when Sunday came and I finally woke up, he wasn't angry at me that I "ruined the whole weekend!!!" I explained to him that since my sleep was already messed up during the week, it would be completely unfair to have me wake up early on the weekend as well. He didn't get angry at all and actually understood!!

On top of that, he has court at 1:30 on Thursday and an appointment on Tuesday which means he will miss a lot of work this week. I agreed to watch the kids longer mon-weds so that he could make up time. Well yesterday he told me that he planned on taking the whole day on Thursday off because of the court. I communicated with him that if he was just going to use even more time off to take the whole day off on Thursday, that I wasn't going to watch the kids extra on mon-weds. I told him that would make me feel like I was watching them longer just so he could have some time alone (which was not what I agreed to when I first agreed to watch them). I told him if he isn't working at all Thursday, then I would not be watching them for longer than normal on mon-weds. He didn't even get slightly angry at this (although it the past he would have).

Now some of you might be thinking that I am being unfair because he may need that time to prepare, might be too stressful, would it even be worth it to go into work before court. So I want to point out that he went to work before court in the past, and he could work 1/2 day from 7-11am (or 630-1130 if he really wanted to) and still have plenty of time to get ready and get to the court ahead of time.

When their biomom came up and took them out of school without my SO's knowledge, and my SO had to find a lawyer right away to get the emergency custody order, my BF went to work that whole day before meeting with the lawyer (lawyers suggestion so my SO didn't miss work).

This court date is also a mediation session -- no lawyers present, no judge deciding anything, basically just SO, the bio mom, and the social working meeting together to try to get both bio parents to agree on the same things (Which we already know won't happen). If this was a court date for a judge to determine custody, I could and would understand him not going to work at all that day, but that isn't what this case Thursday is for.

I am glad that he could actually see my side of things, and not get mad at me just pointing out my opinions on a situation that affects me. Hopefully this level of communication will continue, and we will have less issues in the future.