Something smart to say to grab her attention?
BM is ignoring us.
We don't comunicate with her often but sd was sick and she took her to the doctors. Of course that means there's a co-pay and non working sit on ass all day BM has been haggling us for money. We just need to write her a check for literally $6. It's just IM not doing it and DH has picked up a lot more hours at work so he's been working a lot.
She texts is almost everyday about the $6....cause I guess that's breaking her bank.
Well now she's ignoring us. And we think it's because she hasn't gotten the $6 for the copay yet.
So. According CO (and BM was the one who requested this be in the CO) sd is not allowed to sleep anywhere other than BM or DH's address. And if she doesn't, the on duty parent has to inform the off duty parent of contact info and address of where SD is staying.
It's stupid but we follow it. There have been times where SD would sleep over her friend's house during our time and we always do as we should and inform BM.
Well we found out BM doesn't do the same. (Of course because rules don't apply to her)
We found out that SD has slept over BM's boyfriend's mom's house some nights.
We don't know his mom. Or where she lives. So DH kindly asked for her address. He didn't state that he KNEW sd sleeps there sometimes. Instead he just discretely said he needed to save it for emergency purposes.
She ignored.
He's asked 5 times.
Now DH' has to work on one of his weekends so he contacted her to discuss changing his weekend with SD (it's well in advance. Like two months away)
She hasn't answered or responded....
Wtf? But she can text 200 times about a 6 dollar bill.
I don't know if we should contact her with some smartass comment or just ignore it and then ignore her whenever she wants to discuss something in the future.
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I do understand your
I do understand your frustration, we had a high conflict BM (Uberskank) too. I say had, because skid is now 19 and living on her own and Uberskank moved to a different state in 2013. Then we moved to Hawaii this last year, so distance and an aged out skid is a good thing right now.
I'm going to ask the question, why not just write her the check for six lousy bucks and be done with it?
Regarding her ignoring you and the BM not giving you the info on the parents of SD's friend, you cannot control her actions. You can only control your own actions and your H can only control his.
I know it's frustrating, I've been in your shoes. I watched my H followed the CO, only to have Uberskank follow it when she felt like it or it was to her advantage.
If BM doesn't know that
If BM doesn't know that you've learned the Skids are staying overnights at BF's mother's house, she has o idea why you're asking for that woman's address. If you want the address IMO you need to state why. 'Per the CO on children staying over at non-parental homes blah blah blah, I'll need you [BM] to provide the address for notification and emergency necessities'.
Without reminding BM why DH believes he's entitled per the CO of the address, you chance her thinking DH's just being controlling.
As to the $6? Pay the woman.
As to the desire to reschedule? Be patient. She's annoyed with DH for ignoring her 200 plus request for the co-pay. I don't blame her for not jumping to immediately now respond to DH's communication just because he now wants something. Kind of goes both ways *shrugs*. Bottomline? She doesn't have to agree to a reschedule at all and if there's nothing that states she must respond within x amount of time, she can continue to ignore DH.
Send her a 'smart' attention grabber? Nope. People who ignore someone don't then complain when they are ignored in return. Again, that two way thing *shrugs*
Text her - FYI, we are moving
Text her - FYI, we are moving out of the country.. Will give you address at some point. }:)
OP doesn't state how long of
OP doesn't state how long of time it's been since first inquired about the co-pay. OP just says BM has been texting almost daily. This indicates some days have passed at least. Even if the NCP was busy or needed to wait x amount of time prior to submitting payment, a simple 'Ok, I'll get that to you by the _______ (fill in date)', or perhaps if CO gives a timeline something like 'I have 30 days from notice to submit per the CO, so expect the check by the _________ (fill in the date).
Just ignoring the texts and then whining BM is now ignoring DH is, well, pot calling kettle.
It's been about two
It's been about two weeks.
And we didn't ignore her. Dh needed new checks and Informed her right after her first text that when he gets his checks in the mail, he will write her one.
He even stated that if she couldn't wait, he can PayPal her the money, or send her a money order, or do it through Walmart so she could just go to her local Walmart and get the money.
But she declined all of them. Stated that she would just wait for the check.
But literally text him two days after that about it again. Text about 5 times a day.
Dh got his checks but just hasn't written a check for her yet.
Co doesn't state when he has to pay. It doesn't specify that at all.
Now, literally two days ago she sent us a picture of a lab bill that had a late notice on it. She stated that she hasn't paid it yet and it needs to be paid asap. So Dh went online and paid the lab bill (both his and her half) and then told her he'd write a check for the difference of whatever he owes. (Which is about $6 since he paid the lab bill.)
She never responded to that. He sent her a receipt for the lab bill.
Now he just needs to send her a check.
She's not responding because we ignored her (we didn't).
she's not responding because she hasn't gotten her $6 yet. Which is stupid imo.
Dh did her a favor by paying the lab bill because he knows she's been waiting for his part of the copay. Now he doesn't owe her much (like $6) since he paid the full lab bill.
She'll get her $6. But it's just annoying that she's ignoring us till I'm assuming, she gets the money.
Life still goes on. We still need to discuss things about SD things arise.
I agree that she probably doesn't know Dh knows she has SD spending nights places & not informing him.
Which may be why she's ignoring that. I guess we can tell her we know. We found out via Facebook because there were pictures posted of SD sleeping over someone else's house (even stated in the decription) and Dh was never informed of it. Maybe we'll just wait till SD is here so we can play it like something SD "mentioned" instead of something we saw online (we saved the pics).
Read my last comment. She
Read my last comment. She won't accept anything but a check
I think it's reasonable to
I think it's reasonable to pay within 30 days, even if you get 5 reminders per day for 29 days. I'd just find the constant reminders annoying!
But yeah, nothing you say will really get BM to be less of a pain in the ass. She'll never wake up to reality or apologize for all her jerk moves. Sorry about that.