So glad he's finally putting a stop to her bullshit.

OK, you need to let her behaviour wash over you. Each and every time you react and hide away from her is playing directly into her game. She wins. She was sullen and rude. So what? Teens are often sullen and rude and she isn't a robot where you can reprogramme her overnight (I wish!). She needs to learn new behaviours and attitudes and be given the time to redirect her attitude.

So the next time she is rude and ignores you, just treat her like a normal person. Let HER make her evening pleasant or nasty. YOU have a good time. Say you are out for dinner and she says "I am not hungry." So she goes hungry. She won't die. She will be hungry. Accept her answer as perfectly acceptable because not being hungry is a 'normal behaviour'. Now if she ordered a steak and asked Daddy to cut it up, not normal.
She walks in the door and ignores you. Call out to her "Hello SD, I hope you had a nice time with your mother." Normal respense to seeing her whether she responds or not. If you say "Look what the cat dragged in, the psycho SD! Ewww!" ... not normal nor very nice.

See she needs to learn that her place is as her father's daughter not his equal. And for some reason she has learnt how to be his equal. So it will take time to retrain/ reprogramme her. She will not like it and probably feels threatened by her change of position. But then with a crazy BM she may equate being there and being needy as being loved. I don't know, just guessing.

But certainly, do not hide out cos she won that round. She needs to see you are not able to be driven away cos in her world driving you away from her father's physical presence (like last night) is 2nd only to her being a leech on hisd arm.

And the only reason I say this is because my OSS tried a similar tactic. He would upset me enough that I would go to our bedroom so I didn't have to deal with him. DH told me this is my house and much as it is his and I am to ignore his sons pissy behaviour and I can change the channel as many times as I like, it is OUR TV not OSSs. He spoke to OSS and told him to knock it off. But in return I was not allowed to hide away anymore.

i like this response:

"Look what the cat dragged in, the psycho SD! Ewww!"

Have a great weekend, Daisy! I am so happy that your DH is standing up to your SD. I hope you have a drama free weekend.

have a great time...do not turn the cell on for anything!!

Daisy...I can relate with the SIL drama crap...mine LOVES drama, too and so starts the pot swirling.

I see that maybe BM is not the best...what are the issues. She goes to BM but never stays? If she is allowed to see BM obviously the courts feel BM is ok to be with?

I ask about BM because with my SD19 it has become the same issue and around the the age of 16 as well...SD has cut of BM and won't go to see her and bags on her and always wants to come home when she would go out of state to see her after she moved.

I quickly learned that is was, as mentioned above...a competition thing and that SD was completely a hormonal, psycho wreck.

They don't want to see their mom's because mom sets them straight and they do not like it. Once BM's own mother informed me about a year ago of their awful mother/daughter relationship and all their fighting...the daddy crap came into crystal clear view.

Now that she is away at college...I am limiting her time at our house for many reasons...this being only one.

Hang in there and I agree with an above poster...IT IS YOUR HOUSE...DO NOT HIDE....tell HER to get her ass to her room if she is being a bitch...you do NOT need that influence on other kids in the home. The other kids must be considered, too. Tell her that her crazy ass needs to be away from the sane people...