call it a conflict of interest. as a businesswomen u have every rite.

u just shouldnt mix business w family, ANY type of family. tell DH u would be hesitant to rento to anyone u already know bc IF things got ugly on their end, u would feel bad about holding them accountable, even though thats what u would need to do for yr business...

If friends/family and money never mix.. It certainly wont mix w/your dh's ex wife.

I would not rent to a friend or family member and certainly never to the bm. I can almost GUARANTEE you will not be getting the rent check, and you will still be paying her CS.

I too could hear it now.. you want to evict us??? but why? Eviction is the hardest thing to do as a landlord. My parents own rental property and have problems evicting when there are children living on the premises.

Of course your dh doesnt think its a big deal... Mine wouldnt either.. that is what makes them men.. that they dont realize what some people (and by some people, I mean ex wives) are capable of.

Stick w/your gut, and find a person to rent from you that is not related to your family or your dh's family or past family.. and not friends.

I agree conflict of interest. That would just open up a whole new can of worms. Then if something goes wrong with the house is your husband supposed to run over and fix it for her? i don't think that would sit very well with me. What if she can't pay rent on time or is late? Are you supposed to be understanding because it's the BM? There are so many things that could come up for you and your husband to argue about if she moves in - I just see it as creating more problems. Good luck!

NO, if she ends up not being able to pay the rent, you won't be able to kick her out the way you would a normal tenant because of the kids

Well could she pay up front?

I guess my only concern would be what to do if she does not pay. I mean, just think about the worse possible situation and figure out how you would deal with it. It is YOUR home and YOUR decision. Just think it through completely. Do a worse case scenario analysis and if you can live mentally and financially with that scenario then go for it. Also, make sure to think about the calls in the middle of the night asking your husband to come fix this and that...well, this is sounding worse and worse as I type. Just think it through that is all I am saying...LOL!
Good luck and maybe renting it out for a while is not such a bad with the market performing as it is right now...

I say keep it and rent it to someone else.

It is just too creepy. I can't imagine anyone wanting to live in a house the ex lived in with their new spouse. I don't think I could ever be comfortable there. Seems like major conflict

"I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry" - Rita Rudner

No, my big thing is never mix business with people you know. Ever! Recently we were going to build out our basement and my DH wanted a friend of his to do the work so we could save money. I wouldn't do it! I just kept thinking of all the bad things that could happen mixing business...so now the builder that built the house is going to do the work and DH and his friend can remain just that...friends.

It is very tough legally to evict someone from a rental property. Don't go there - you have such a nice thing going now. Plus, it is YOUR hard earned money. If anything were to happen negatively you would end up resenting your DH which is the last thing you need right now!! BM can find another rental

Forrest, run!

Oh.. and for reference checks.. get the phone numbers of the references, then go to google and type in reverse look up. then plug the number in and see that it matches the name that they provided you. Make sure to tell them that you do not want people's cell numbers (as reverse look up doesnt work on those, and then you cant be sure its who they say it is)..

That is a measure my mom started taking when she told me she had some sketchy references.. I plugged them in and could tell her if she was calling who she thought she was calling!!

...but then I went out to the garage for a pry bar and opened my mind a crack.

If she were willing to put down a deposit equal to, say, two months' rent, plus a cleaning deposit, that would buy you two months of time in which to evict her and get new renters if she defaults. She would get the money back when she moves out or after you feel like she's demonstrated that she can be trusted, whichever comes first. If she stops paying, she forfeits the deposit. Meanwhile, you put that money into a high yield account as insurance for "what if."

I don't usually think it's a good idea to mix family and money or business. That's why my gut says no. But who's to say that the lovely young couple with sparkling credit reports and great references that you choose instead won't get slammed by life... loss of a job, devasting illness with unforeseen medical expenses, etc.?! It could happen. It's a risk, no matter who you choose to rent to. With family, you run the risk of there being hard feelings if it doesn't work out, but with a BM, that particular aspect might not be that big of a deal. They hate us, anyway.

♥ Georgia, the un-stepmom ♥

"Good men don't just happen. They have to be created by us women." (from ROSEANNE)

Maybe keep it and rent it theorugh an agency.... sure you'll loose some of the money, but they will be in charge of evictions if it comes to that. If she pays consistantly for the first couple of years... then drop the agency and go it alone... if she doesn;t pay.... it is the agency who gets the blame.... they have to enforce the rents.

You know that she is looking for a free place to stay. If she gets in the house it will be a nightmare getting her out of there. Just say no.

Eviction takes WAY longer than 2 months.. 2 months would happen if you tried to evict her in say June. The reason being. Judges NEVER rule in favor of eviction during the school year when there are school children involved. TRUST me.. I have seen my mom go through it hundreds of times and NEVER in the winter. Also, the cost to evict is a lot, you need to hire a lawyer, and then god forbid she doesnt show up the first hearing, and you need to pay your lawyer to sit there through the next hearing.

You would need like 9 months of rent for a deposit in order to not lose out on that one w/her. (of course I am still assuming that she is going to stiff you guys!!) I think the gamble on a complete stranger would be a better calculated risk, then renting to someone that you pay CS to each month, or another family member or friends.

Please.. dont do it.

And I say NO and not just because it is BM even tho that is a good enough reason for me but it is such a pain. I was in the rental business for years and my parents rented our childhood home out to "friends" after we moved. It can be so bad, someone else will never EVER take care of your home the way that you would, or even close. Our home was so trashed when these "friends" moved out that it was hardly recongnizable. You will be responsible for a great deal of the repairs and may have to increase your home owners insurance. I say sell it to the highest bidder.

~Evil

If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. ~Abigail Van Buren

This would provide BM a prime opportunity for leverage. If she gets angry at you or DH, she can just trash your house! And why not? She knows the house is an investment for you and DH that she will now have control over.

Are you willing to take that risk?

Colorado, you posed the question because you likely have doubts. Listen to your gut! Put yourself first here, and keep this important business decision free from family entanglements. If you rent to BM, you will only be increasing your stress, and the outcome won't be good.

I would have to say a resounding NO. If you rent it out, you will be responsible for any maintenance so guess who will be getting more calls...that's right, you and DH.

This is not a good idea no matter how you look at it. If you do decide to rent it out, go through a real estate agency, one who will screen prospective tennants for you. I have heard too many horror stories about unruly tennants.

If you are thinking of selling, again, consult with a real estate agent to get a better idea of what the market is like in your area. You might be better off trying to sell and reinvesting in a new home.

WAY TO CLOSE FOR COMFORT!!!!!

Do not do it....it will not be worth the hassles in the future!! Keep your boundaries up & even though hubby doesnt think it isnt a big deal, you should. All the way around, its not a good idea.

We currently have our house up for sale...if the BM made us an offer, we would not accept it...anyone but her.

Let us know what you decide to do.

Corie

and NO for two different reasons!
First, DO NOT SELL YOUE HOUSE! (it is your nest egg, security blanket, whatever you want to call it) and HELL NO to the EX renting it! Go with what your gut is telling you... Believe me when I say you will REGRET EVER SELLING,and REALLY regret renting to EX! I wish I had kept my "security blanket!"
hangingin

We've been landlords for awhile and I hate it. In fact we're not landlords anymore. We finally sold everything. It is just plain difficult. Tenants ruin things, don't treat your propterty like you would want, they don't pay etc.... Now put the ex wife in, and holy ((*&@#$(*#&@. Will she pay, will she decide to spite you one day when she's mad, will she trash it to be mean. If you still decide to rent it out, just find a better tenant that you can kick out and keep the deposit without the hassles of step/ex etc. If she can afford your rent then she can find something else.

Just my two bits.

Make sure you protect the equity you have in your home. If you sell it and use the proceeds towards a bigger house for all of you, make sure you keep your original investment from being absorbed into the new property that you will own jointly with DH.

♥ Georgia, the un-stepmom ♥

"Good men don't just happen. They have to be created by us women." (from ROSEANNE)

absolutely DO NOT ALLOW that!!!

I guarantee you there will be problems-DON'T DO IT!!!!

Just kidding...wanted to be different! Sell the bloody thing, tenants and taxs and rates and maintenence...bugger that sell it and invest or fixed term deposit or blue chip shares or whatever for your retirement. BM or not in the equation, you have had enough drama's with her. We are all living proof that sharing kids doesn't go real well, I somehow doubt sharing a home in this ay will go any btter for you. His kids, his problem, your house, your decision..Hugs x

Catch xx
*Mean People Suck*

I wouldn't just not rent it to her, I wouldn't rent it period. It's playing with fire to rent your home.

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

I am with the herd on this one. No way in hell!

Think for Yourself