OK OK, I know back in the day when girls got pregnant out of wedlock they were shamed w/out mercy, it was extreme....and now these days we have the opposite, they are applauded and celebrated and show excitement when an unmarried 20yr old couple winds up pregnant.  If you remember anything about my SD she is attention seeking to a fault and LOVES receiving accolades and tons of presents.

So here she is, barely 8 weeks pregnant and on Mother's day does this elaborate FB announcement of her pregnancy.  Her and her boyfriend are fully fancy dressed/hair done/makeup, looks just like engagement photos- or those last trimester/gender announcements.  All with onesies, little shoes, multiple signs -one they hold, another her dog has around his neck, with all those glitzy/glamour shots and 100plus comments of congrats, how lovely, wonderful, etc...and of course being all over the moon excited and can't wait, etc.  

I said NOTHING on comments, not even a like- DH is disgusted and angry and doesn't even have FB so he saw it through mine when I showed him.  She is 20, never wanted kids and suddenly she's in full glory with glamour shots-including him kissing her non bump and holding it when she's not even pass 1st trimester - most SANE people wait at least 12-16 weeks before announcing and making this kind of spectacle....and the ONLY time I've seen this kind of shoots it was around the last weeks of pregnancy or when revealing gender and they are much further along....doing all this for a 8 week pregnancy that she didn't even want and is NOWHERE close to ready for is just plain stupid and disturbing.  She's going to ruin her life - she's also the kind to love multiple gifts from her sources.  Place your bets now, how many showers do you think she will have?

I'm guessing 3, 4?  They are planning to move to his parents place out of state in a couple months (good for us) -so I imagine her bf's mom will have one there and invite her friends.  BM will throw one (and I'm sure ask us to help coordinate, co-plan, etc-big fat NO).  Her job if she's still employed and stays here, another one- or maybe she'll have them throw her one before she moves, when she's around 4 months.  I can see it now.  The gift grab she did for herself growing up was nauseating, that's about to get so much worse!!!

On another note- my son is still in his day program and has been pretty stable...no halucinations, paranoia is much less, happier, less defiant.  For the first time in years I had a good Mother's day.  We aren't big on gifts and we're all broke, so I got a card- BUT and this is HUGE, I was able to get him, my younger son and my husband AND the dogs to spend the day together at our leased property.  We have a property we lease that has several hundred acres and a quail house where we take the dogs off leash, do some fishing and do quail hunt training when in season.  We took my 20 gauge and a 410  w/a made up target to practice.  So we got to blow off some steam watching the dogs play/swim, look for birds when we shot (even though we didn't plant any-they did track down and busted a covey), we had ome sandwiches, fished, and did some off roading in my Subaru around streams, fields and narrow paths.  My car got filthy- we enjoyed every second.  My son w/the mental health issues has had my husband as a target of his anger for years now so they haven't been able to co-exist almost at all- so this was ground-breaking.  They got along, my husband showed them proper shotgun safety (don't worry, we have them in a huge safe sohe has NO access) -it was like old times how they interacted before his illness took hold. They used to be very close.  There have been no arguments, fights or yelling from my son towards him or any of us for a couple weeks now.  Things are looking up for the time being (still won't take meds) - this outpatient group is helping a lot...sadly he only has a couple more weeks.  He's eager to start finding a job but we shall see how he copes if/when he gets one. 

Sorry for the long ramble.  

Edit to add: On a completely separate note, wasn't sure whether I'm ready to discuss this at this point, but I am considering separating from DH- our marriage is on the brinks.  Not all is related to the issues with my son- it's his own personal demons that I"ve had enough of.  He did go see his mom today - and discussed possibility of moving there if things continue like they are with us. I wrote him a letter of things I need to consider staying in this marriage, he hasn't even read it yet- probably read a paragraph and stopped.  The reality is I don't see things changing anytime soon.  No matter how much I've tried to help him get his life together, aid in his health problems (mostly caused by drinking) and now unemployment.  So yeah....in my mind I"m pretty much 90pct 'out' but unlike my previous marriage I do still love him -or who I though he could be or who he is when not in throws of this mess.   Finances are worrying me tremendously as I'm still unemployed after being laid off after 24 yrs but it's not like he brings anything to the table anyway.  

I also know this, even though I'm 46, if we split I will probably face a lifetime alone- and as far as friendship/companion we had a very good ride.  Having a kid with mental health issues and possibly living w/me for a long time- add all my pets, add my desires of moving to MX when I retire (or earlier if possible)- finding someone who would accept all this mess is moot, but I shouldn't settle for being with someone like my DH rather then be alone either.  Who's to say I can't achieve these dreams I have alone?  Just harder and not as fulfilling as with him and the man he once was.  Life pretty much sucks right now.