Wanting to be away from home
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Why is it that if feels better to be at work or out sometimes when there is so much going on at home?
Like at times my step kids fight each other alot and dissagreements, disrespectfuk mouths. And their mom doesnt do much bout it. Not enough consistancy in the house and dealing with rude step kids. When it comes time for work i feel so much better staying there all day. Have you ever felt like this before?
I've felt this
Working overtime to avoid home... well avoid my ex. Who never had a job. Yeah when you're unhappy, you'll avoid it. Now I feel that way EOW... I dread the days my skids are here. Not because they're outta control but because they are entitled and come over to hole up in their rooms all weekend. Why?? Why do they still come over? Yeah I've avoided things, usually when I'm depressed.
I have worked longer hours to
I have worked longer hours to avoid going home. Or working late from home. It works.
If your SO isn't hearing you then physically remove yourself. It's been a part of my disengaging.
I get this!
Everyone needs a place to feel safe, loved, and important. Ideally that should be in your own home. Reality is our home environment is not always that place. It should be though. Its sad when a home environment does not give you that.
Blessings
Wish home was my haven
My first post here. I can't tell you how many things I've read in the last 24 hours and it made me feel much better! Thank you. I moved across Canada with DH & SS12 & SD10 (ages now) It's been a difficult ride for 3 years now. As of last summer I had to begin disengaging to save my sanity. Home is no longer a fun place to retreat to, but a place I avoid whenever I can. I work as long as possible, get out wth friends, and have joined a couple of groups to keep me occupied. DH is resentful of the disengagement, but SS is s disrespctful and lies so much I just don't want to be around anymore. It's sucking the joy out of me. I wished I had a thought this through, but I never saw it coming.
Nanny cams
Disengaging more. Your "D" h needs to step up and parent, so disengagement means he has to actually do the work, and thats why hes feeling resentful. Its not his parenting, its YOU disengaging. Thats BS.
I would say that most have felt like this.
A pretty common and not infrequent choice for many (S)Parents.
Staying at work a couple of extra, unnecessary, hours, going in to work on the occassional week end, etc...
Scheduling the occassional weekend long activity with buddies, sending a spouse and the (S)Kid(s) on a trip to visit (their) family, etc...
Also, not an unusual thing for those who are not in blended families. It is okay to need a reprieve.
Enjoy it rather than lamenting it.
Grab A Six Pack And Enjoy
I remember when my wife's grandma passed away. She was a sweet lady and was almost 100 years old.
I knew my wife wanted to go home for the funeral and all I could think about was my SDs being there without her there (terribly selfish I know). So I called her up and said:
"Hey hun, I think this would be a great opportunity for you and the girls to spend some time together, how about I go ahead and purchase three round-trip plane tickets for the funeral."
She agreed and the second I was off the phone I booked their flight. After I dropped the wife and SDs off I stopped and bought a 6 pack of my favorite IPA and spent the weekend with my biological kids. We went to the trampoline park which got them nice and tired and then when they went to bed I pounded my 6-pack while watching College Football. Good Times.
Everyone needs a break. No need to feel guilty. If your SO starts noticing you are doing it too much then have a conversation.