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Expecting a baby with an SD10

StepOnMe101's picture

Submitted by StepOnMe101 on Sat, 05/31/2014 - 10:22am

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Blended Family Issues

I am almost 8 months pregnant with an SD10 almost 11 at home. I have noticed recently she is hanging on my DH a lot more which I assume is because she knows pretty soon she will no longer be the only apple of his eye. She is very needy and she manipulates DH into still doing things for her she is very capable of doing on her own. Lately I can even see she is jealous when he gives me attention. Yesterday he was scratching my bag on the couch and she comes up and curls on his lap with her head on his shoulder and trying to grab and hold his hand (the one scratching my back) the affection is a bit odd to me because I did not come from a family where I was hanging all over my Daddy ESPECIALLY at almost 11 years old. I know that part of this is normal but some of it just seems over the top to me. DH and I got on the discussion last night of SD helping to change babies diaper when he is born. I am NOT comfortable with this. Honestly I dont trust she would clean him up efficiently..I feel I am going to be a very protective mother of my first and new baby boy. What is everyones thoughts on this?? I am finding my SD is getting on my nerves a lot more the sooner it gets to the baby being born. I feel guilty but as always I cannot help how I feel. Sad

twoviewpoints's picture

Submitted by twoviewpoints on Sat, 05/31/2014 - 10:39am

I'd just tell husband 'no' to the diaper bit. Not because you wouldn't trust her to do it well, but because you don't feel like it's her place to have to change the baby. SD shouldn't feel she's having to take care of her new sibling (not that you intend to make or perhaps even allow her to her care for baby).

Best to let husband think it's more about not wanting to burden SD with stinky diapers and the real possibility of getting whizzed at (he is a baby boy) than about not trusting her or that she'd do a poor job.

Orange County Ca's picture

Submitted by Orange County Ca on Sat, 05/31/2014 - 1:41pm

I also think its nothing more than her insecurities. Daddy should make extra time for her until she gets used to the idea.

katielee's picture

Submitted by katielee on Sun, 06/01/2014 - 9:23am

Uh....can anyone say MINI-WIFE???

Her behavior needs to be nipped in the bud NOW. No quarter for the Mini-Wife. You have to crack down on it every single time.

lili77's picture

Submitted by lili77 on Fri, 06/06/2014 - 2:46pm

I don't mind my step daughter helping out with my baby now 2 I actually liked and and I also use the extra hand when she is around. think abt it this way maybe the baby will distract her from ur husband and she won't be all over him..abt the diaper change that is ur called if it was me I would nt mind as long as I'm there and get to teach her how to do it right. abt her trying to take dad attention when he is w u he needs to talk to her and explain her you are his wife and she is his kid not wife and the love is different he needs to make time for both and sometimes just u and tell her is mom and dad time and ask her to be by herself and he needs to make sure u don't feel left out. my husband is pretty good on that part and he makes sure she knows he loves me and include her trust me u won't regret it my Mon had this saying u can catch more flys w honey