Being asked to leave my home when the kids visit??
My fiance (Sam) is moving in with me full time at the end of next month when his lease is up. He has two kids 16 (Molly) and 13 (Ella) from a previous marriage. His kids want little to nothing to do with me as they are still hopeful their parents will reunite and they'll be a family again.
Recently the kids have stated they will not be comfortable being here if Sam is living with me full time as they will feel like they do not have a home with their dad anymore when they are with him. The kids have been to my house before and I've tried to make them feel welcome and prepare their favorite meals and plan outings with them.
The kids and their mom are requesting that I leave and get a hotel room or stay with friend/family member when they want to spend the night after Sam moves in full time so he can focus on just the kids and they can feel like my house is their dad's home and be more comfortable here.
Sam says no way, that this time they need to adjust and accept because he's catered to them and their whims since the divorce 6 years ago and he sees them every week. That it's not ok to ask me to leave my home when he's moving in with me and I've been really good to them when I see them. I already tolerate being excluded from a lot!
The kids are refusing to visit if I stay there when they come over and their mom is saying she won't make them because it will be uncomfortable and traumatic for them to see their dad living with me and they are still struggling from the divorce and need to see their parents as a united front. The custody agreement us 50/50 on paper but there is no set schedule.
I know Sam wants his kids to come over and I don't blame him for that but I refuse to leave my home to make them happy and so it can be like I'm not part of the picture anymore.
Am I being unfair to my fiance and his relation with his kids if I refuse to leave every other weekend??