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dam if I do and dam if I dont....

dandy7's picture

So one game after another....when do exs grow up and appreciate the step mom for trying....I could be the stepmom from hell but I treat her kids as my own and do as I would my own...she likes drama and loves to be able to talk shit and well I guess I dont give her enough reason so she creates her own..

So before my 11yo SS leave for his mothers visit I ask him if he would like to go shopping for promotion or does he care if I grab him something... went threw the dress up clothe line....suit tie bowtie suspenders collar shirt button up pollo ect...he said he wanted to go causal and a button would be fine....

So as hes gone im shopping n making our leis and preparing for our busy week...

When he returns, he brings suit his mother buys him...he said he told her I was getting him something but she said he could pick something out n if wear what ever one he likes. ..

When do I stop trying....if i dont do for them my spouse is upset cause I do kore for my BC...and when I do do for them its always shut dowm by their BM..

I see it as a game and all it does is confuse the kids and they resent me more...

As usual I suck up my emotional....well mothers feeling never really matter cause we are always expected to be tuff...

hangingbyathread6's picture

Hate to say it, but my experience with the BM in my situation...she will never change. At least yours actually buys your skids their clothes. Our BM asks us to buy clothes to send to her house and when we refuse, she tells the skids all kinds of wonderful things about their dad and I...why can't BM's (who by the way is the one who left the marriage for another man almost 9 years ago) just be happy the dad has a woman in the kids' lives who takes care of them. UGH.

lili77's picture

I never get anything or do anything for my step daughter so I dont have to be upset, and when i do it which is every now and then i merely do it thinking about my husand and that im pleasing him so if she makes faces or does not like i dont get hurt all i expect is my husbands happy face and that is what matters to me:)

Rose.Colored.Glasses's picture

Thats a good way of looking at it Smile Too see your husbands happy face. Love it. I learn new things every day.

Rags's picture

That rarely ever happens. I am sure it does happen, just not too often.

In my blended family adventure the toothless moron Sperm Clan will never realize that the best thing to ever happen to my Skid is the marriage between his mom and I. My bride and I are commited to our family and to minimizing the impact of the shallow and polluted end of my Skid's gene pool.

The drooling Sperm Clan minions don't have a complete brain cell between them to come to this realization much less the character to admit it.

Don't stop trying as far as being a viable parent to your Skids. As for expecting recognition from the BM ... that is something you should have never started.

Don't forget to take care of yourself in all of this.

Sincerely,