SD tearing family apart
Hi i am new to this site and im so glad i have found it because i dont no where else to turn :/ I have a 2 1/2 year old step daughter and shes basically tearing our family apart. My boyfriend has her every fortnight for a week, he is an amazing dad (we have a 4 month old of our own aswell). I have been with him just over year and basically got to meet his daughter straight away, i used to really look forward to seeing her, she always used to play with me and get excited about seeing me, we used to have so much fun together.....but in the last couple of months she has turned into a really nasty little girl to the point where im breaking down, shes started to get violent towards to me, shes been hitting me, kicking me, pulling my hair, throwing things at me , saying shes gonna slap me, telling me to fuck of, calling me a dickhead and just everything nasty you can think of she does it....i have never been anything but nice to her since i have met her, always treat her, spend time with her, play with her, and just love her and this is how i get repaid, i get treated like this by a 2year old its not right!!! Its got to the point where im starting to feel hate towards her and i dont want her here, i no thats horrible but i cant cope anymore, she screams and winges at everything when she doesnt get her own way, she always shouts and screams when my 4 month old daughter is asleep and shes evan tried throwing things at my daughter, im worried shes gonna hurt my daughter :/ I really dont no what to do anymorem, has anyone got any advice because im breaking down and its tearing me and boyfriend apart, i feel like if this carries on we may end up splitting up, i dont want that because i love him so much, just sometimes i wish i never fell in love with him but now i can imagine my life without him xx
She's not tearing any family
She's not tearing any family apart. She's TWO.
It's up to her dad and mum to do something to help her and get to the root of why she's so violent. THEY are the problems, not sd.
The arrival of a new sibling
The arrival of a new sibling can really disrupt some children, its not anyone's fault, but the new sibling may have a lot to do with the 2 year old playing up. Do a google search to look for ides on helping the older sibling adjust better to sharing Dad and you with the new baby
She sounds like she needs a
She sounds like she needs a few really big hugs.
Maybe smother her with kindness... and really make some time aside from the new baby for jus you and her time and really play that up...
Like I really want to take you to the park so we can hang out together etc..
However it is possible that BM from hell is behind all of this as well.
I think a part of the problem
I think a part of the problem may be sibling jealousy, its normal and happens all the time, try talking to her about how she feels about her younger half sibling and try to help her turn any negative thoughts to positive, let her know your still her friend even though you have a new addition to the family, ask her to help with small things like passing the nappy and reward her for it.
I think it's down to respect also, you say you've been super nice and all that which is great but at the same time you also need to let her know that in your house you and your partner are the boss and that naughty behavior will not be excepted, be firm but loving.
This is not easy and i understand your upset but if things end between you and your partner, it wont be because of this little girl but because you and your partner aren't working together to fix the problem and if you can't work together now there is NO way you'll be able to do it the future coz this is nothing, wait until the kids are older!