Well, no social worker has came.  They rescheduled and husband finally went into their office to tell them just what his daughter was.  He told them that she was a brat that lies, steals, and would do anything to get attention.  He sees her for what she is and it is sad.  I feel for him, because as a parent I would hate to know this of my child.  I use to love SD (years ago), but too much as been done to me and against me to ever be able to open up and establish a relationship with her.  I would never want to even attempt it now.  My H is not a bad parent, he just isn't consistent with her.  That really is the key to a child like that.  He knows what she is, and does not trust her one bit.  She has no phone, tablet, nothing.  He will not allow it.  She wanted to take drivers ed and he said absolutely not, that she was not responsible enough for him to even begin to think about letting her drive.  He just doesn't know what to do with her.  He put her in a behavioral unit and honestly they did nothing, but charge us an arm and leg.  She has attempted suicide at school no less, she staged the whole thing, put a letter on the floor when leaving the classroom, went to the office and told them she took a bunch of pills.  She was taken by ambulance to the hospital, stayed 2 days there and again sent to a behavioral unit for 2 weeks.  She said that she did it to make her dad call her bio mom, she claimed that was the reason.  It is hard to believe anything out of her mouth.  Sadly they did not help her either, and during all that, never has she ever mentioned me being emotional abusive to her.  It was the opposite, she wanted to come home and be a part of the family.  It has been a lot and while I do not love her like a parent should, I do care about her well-being.  I have said for years that she needs help emotionally, I have said for years that I believe she has ODD, because I have never seen a child bulk you like she does.  You set a rule and she will purposely set out to break it, she cannot help it.  She will get mad if you tell her to do something, and will get snappy with you.  She sees a councilor, but she lies to her.  She is great a playing a victim and H has told them this.  They are not helping, you have to want to be helped and be honest about things.  H looked into therapeutic boarding schools, but that is definitely for the rich.  Any suggestions would be great!

I also will not leave even though it is hell sometimes, I love my H first, but I also will not because of our 8 year old.  I have been divorced and had no control on what my X did or had around my older kids.  Never again.  I would never leave if I knew that our 8 year old would have to spend time alone with SD.  At least here I can watch him and know what goes on, I cannot do that if I am not here with them.  That may seem crazy but, I have seen what SD can do when she gets mad.  Thank you all for listening, it does feel good to just vent.